Tell that to the rest of the world where shit like this doesn’t happen at the rate it does here. Does no one want to commit acts of terror in the rest of the world? Only in the US?

Someone beat me to it already but it is tough to shame someone who has no shame. After turning on the TV this morning and immediately trying to figure out if anyone we knew was in Las Vegas, my wife and I talked about the fact that nothing will change. Sometime this week, and it may have already happened, someone will…

My favorite granny saying is “ you gone let yo’ alligator mouf getcho hummingbird ass whupped!”

My Great-Uncle was one of the Best “yarn-spinners” EVER! He and his firefighter buddies took turns on who could tell the best and most believable BS. He legit had my naive ass believe brown cows were where chocolate milk comes from. Brown & white: caramel milk. Red cows:strawberry. Black & White: malted milk. Black…

My mom says that all the time. She’s almost 70 with a cane and will say that right before she swings like she Sammy Sosa

I’m just brown, but this list immediately had me thinking about the need for the companion piece: “household items most likely to kill you.” My 4'11" abuelita swung a mean wooden ruler (with that metal strip on the one edge).

“You don’t know me..”

I grew up in Mexico and “búscame y me vas encontrar” is a modification of the Salvadorian phrase. It implies, strongly, that they want you to come and look for them. The implication being that they crazy. And that you just got an invitation to come and find them.

My mom would say Salvadorean equivalent which is “buscame y me encontraras” which is ‘look for me and you’ll find me.” I in turn, would not go looking for her.

Any one of these while clap talking. E.G. What 👏 not 👏 gone 👏 do 👏...Threat level Run.

Do you have to look around and cross your arms for a “Oh fo-real” to be a true threat?

“You know what” in general is a bad look. Usually more of a pre-departure statement, but can be a pre-lose it statement...

Lol, that makes no sense, but I can see some country person saying it. One of my favorites is: “Don’t write checks with yo mouth that yo ass can’t cash.”

“Oh fo-real?”

That’s the telltale sign that the “catch a fade” card is in play.

“Oh you think fat meat ain’t greasy?” is the most fun threat of them all.

A well placed “Nigga, what?” is a sign of doom.

“...you know what, fuckit...”

“See me...” is an underrated gem. It a warning, that doubles as an appointment slot for an impending ass whoopin.

“Boy look here...” didn’t make the list huh?