How about this?

That reminded me of the Narwhal song. And I’m perfectly ok with that.

Snake oil doesn’t actually do anything for you. Now what you really want are these narwhal tears I just happen to have.

Crazy. I will put any chocolate bar in my mouth for 5 cents.

because it’s oil pulling REINVENTED. c’mon Linda, get with the modern kid-times or some such.

I work as a social media manager and just spent 2 hours of my life talking to the manager of an Instagram influencer about a post. The issue was that the guy wanted 5k more to have the product (a chocolate bar) in his mouth instead of his hands. This is what my life is.

I don’t really make much $$$ and that payment per post thing with Scott Disick made me sad as fuck, thanks

Oh, Cardi, I love you, but a lot of women under the age of 26 think they are “naturally skinny,” and they are not. I thought that once too. I thought that once too.

What kind of creepy ass school did you attend?

Yeah, but if you didn't see season one you wouldn't know. That is some natural looking new hair.

Mmmmmm-hmmmm.

that’s some good advice from Andrew WK, btw.

me during these updates instead of a popcorn gif

As a straight man...

Scene: Me and my 4 year old son playing Star Wars yesterday. I was apparently Kylo Ren and he was “An Evil Jedi”

Jason Momoa is the best. Also: