Pound it, Solange.

She does a bitch proud. Dex Dexter was my favorite husband and his name was pretty awesome. He could be a superhero or a porn star.

And the theme music.

Don't you mean Alexis Morrell Carrington Colby Dexter? Reeeeeear.

I see either Donna Mills (Knots Landing) or Morgan Fairchild (Paper Dolls or Falcon Crest, I prefer Paper Dolls) wearing this. I'm very obsessed with 80's night time soaps.

Damn it! Why can't I order these clothes NOW? I have an 80s themed costume party next Saturday. GRRRRR.

I'll see you in the water fountain later for a cat fight. I'll be wearing my fighting shoulder pads.

When are stirrup pants going to make a comeback? Seems like the obvious next step from jeggings.

I see nothing wrong or outdated in any of these styles.

I had this dress! I was 13 and we had just moved from Utah to Illinois. I was trying desperately to make friends and fit it, which is no easy feat for an introverted geek. I was included in a group invitation to a girl's Sweet 16 party (like, she got up in Sunday School and said "Hey, I'm having my Sweet 16 party and…

I love how indulgent 80's fashion was!! Just like the 70's was reminiscent of the 40's, the 80's went full on over the top like the 50's: MORE RUFFLES! MORE TULLE! MORE SHINE!

Hey guys, also from that year's catalogue, the Crimper.

The green shiny taffeta number looks almost exactly like the dress my mom sewed for me for the Winter Frolic at the Lawn Club in 1988, except it had a bubble skirt. My mom must have loved me, because the bodice was boned.

Dear Lord I miss the '80s.

My uncompromising love for both the guitar and the synth styles of the 80's compels me to point out that "Tell It To My Heart" has a very unique and fun synth solo.

Soooo Dynasty.

That's actually offensive enough that someone may pursue legal action. If they use Bay-area lawyer Mi Su Yu, that station is fucked.

"It’s as if Jordan, sure to be an Academy Award Best Actor nominee, is negotiating minute by minute who Oscar is — and who he needs to be." - That's not acting that's called being a young black man in America.

So if Jezebel isn't the place for TMI, I don't know where is: am I the only person who thinks length is totally overrated anyway? Girth and friction in the lower part of the vaginal canal are the source of pleasure IME; getting poked in the cervix and/or ovaries is painful, and worrying it'll happen is a major turnoff.