Oh dear God no, never do that. Teeth have no place down there. Ever.

Become an expert and have a vagina?

Erm... why?! Pinterest is customisable, it's gender neutral and is not "for the girls".

Nah, I wanted to make sure that whatever happened later down the line - I knew divorce was on the cards, and her dad was a pretty senior Lawyer - I was whiter than white and I wouldn't have anything on record I'd regret.

I got given them as wedding presents.

See, when I found out my wife of four months was cheating, doing that was my first reaction. I decided not to.

So I was going to type up either a sarcastic response along the lines of "yeh, whenever I'm out with the boys, it's always a toss up between video games and watching the football or for a really good time we get ready to do some rapey stuff".

Bit of a hatchet job really.

Oh no, clearly I'm failing in what it is to be male... I have no harem, I had one marriage and only go on about 2 dates a month.

Replying to promote

"a grand total of three women were paid to falsely claim in videotaped interviews that they had sex Menendez"

Kick Ass was my surprise favourite film of the last few years - cannot wait for this one!

Personally, the sooner equal maternity and paternity leave comes, the better.

It can be done - I ummm... have this friend that's done it while Scuba diving.

Ummm... no thanks, I've got enough troubles getting to the finishing line as it is!

Whenever I recruit for a new Producer, I am now retitling that job description and advert "Spermologer". That ought to get the applications up!

This

I was thinking the same thing, my ex was a career student who stayed at home while I commuted, paid for the house and the bills and I still did half the housework.

Ugh, I hire engineers for a living and I'm constantly bringing this up; not just for women, but for all under-represented minorities.

I wasn't actually disagreeing with Sir Patrick at all, nor referring to him, purely just replying to Porxaderp and alleviating (as far as I can) his confusion.