Don’t be obtuse. He’s not in charge of North America. He’s running it.

I for, for one, want to complain about Mark’s job performance. My toilet is reluctant to flush and thus I find he is not running North America properly. In a similar vein, I am highly disappointed with the options I have on the ballot and would ask if he can correct this as well.

i’m sad that this is the first time i’m hearing about the garlic fest because it sounds like a wonderful place with wonderful food. one question, though: did your girlfriend get a garlic snow cone?

I’m sorry, sir. This accurate understanding of the constitution is far too originalist for the activist conservative judiciary /s

This. Gun ownership on some level is a debatable right. Gun ownership as a CONSTITUTIONAL right is insane. Constitutional rights are those rights required for a functioning democracy. Gun ownership ain't it.

It would be exceedingly difficult to get it repealed.

If you don't want to repeal the 2nd Amendment, that means you are OK with this. REPEAL THE SECOND AMENDMENT.

Probably...it’s from Atlanta, right? Amazing how hard it is to come up with something! (When I lived in Kentucky, RC cola was the thing. Nobody really drank Coke. I’m old and I was young, so that would have been in the early-to-mid sixties.)

I was going to say shitty banjo music but then I remembered even the banjo was invented by Africans.

This is the real southern heritage.

You know, the Navy has one simple request. And that is to have ships with frigate laser beams attached to their decks.

“Come along, dear. I don’t have a million dollars.”

I think we have to remember the late 90s were a different era, and things... well, it’s honestly like that Portlandia skit: The dream of the 90s is alive in Portland.

I think Iacocca was ahead of the curve on the butter substitute, too. RIP, sir, and thank you.

Quartz is actually pretty cheap - still not as cheap as laminated counter-tops but close.

TPMS that doesn’t give pressure readouts, I check them but it is nice to know if a tire is suddenly low and knowing if need to stop immediately, go to next exit, or keep going, instead all I get is the fucking idiot light. I have 3 different screens(2 cluster plus infotainment) in my car and not one will tell me the…

Sirrus  radio. Who the hell is going to pay for radio.

“It was planned.”

Oh man, I really wish there had been a comma after chicken. I didn’t ever want to have to come to this realization.

Volvo and Audi a correct, Volvo is latin for “I roll” and Audi means listen.