Not even talking to you at all. Sorry compassion is so hard for you :(

Here’s the thing: when it’s all you’re able to do, it can be a lifeline. Sometimes it’s what people need to get through to the next day, and that is in no way wildly unhealthy.

It becomes wildly unhealthy when it becomes the only way you’re able to cope with things because the rest of the world doesn’t give you a…

You know, when I was disabled and struggling with ADLs, I would have LOVED having someone come over and make me dinner, or even invite me over to have dinner/watch a movie/play board games. problem is the people I hung out with couldn’t see fun if it wasn’t drugs/party/drinking/bars. And that wasn’t where I needed to…

I’m not at all puzzled. There’s a lot of privileged people out there who’ve never really had to deal with really hard, serious struggles, so they don’t understand. Add to that 200 years of systemic racism, labeling Black people as “less intelligent” and “mentally challenged” (make no mistake modern attitudes towards…

Science. Go read about it. And your ignorance is ony making it harder for everyone. https://patientengagementhit.com/news/understanding-stigma-as-a-mental-healthcare-barrier?utm_content=b1281c3eaa9e820f79ecee0fe1311937&utm_campaign=MHD%25206%252F8%252F17&utm_source=Robly.com&utm_medi

Because you fail to understand how her disease *literally affects how her brain functions* to the point where she is *literally unable to do these things*. It is a DISABILITY, it is not a choice. Clearly you haven’t yet been there fighting with a brain that’s not working. Look: I have C-PTSD and PTSD comorbid. I do…

Here’s some ways to help your friends who are struggling. Step 1: stop expecting them to be the same. they’re not. they’re dealing with an illness.
Step 2: see where they are and what they need. If you can help with these things, do so.
Step 3: treat them like a human being with an illness. you wouldn’t ask a person…

I’m gonna put this out here toO right now the entire world is going through a mental health crisis. we’re all struggling with trauma and all showing the symptoms. But Black Americans, Native Americans, Latinx people, whites have been inflicting trauma on them for GENERATIONS and their trauma is IMMENSE and…

I’ve started to understand that functional and unhealthy is just unhealthy. it’s not sustainable and it makes things worse. That’s after 25 years of dealing with it. 

THIS. How many times do I need to say it? When someone is going through something, THEY NEED TO BE ABLE TO PROCESS IT. Yanking them out into this hell to make them “feel better” isn’t helping them process it. Expecting them to live life as usual when going through shit is not ok. If you’re their friend, ACKNOWLEGE how…

It’s an extremely gruelling and taxing job. If you think it doesn’t “take requirements” you’ve never worked over a hot grill, day in and day out. These people make your food. 

if you care about your friends, learn about their illnesses and how they affect them. Learn about how other people are figuring out how to live happy lives. And learn to accept that not everyone is going to be able to do all the things you want to do, all the time, especially when they’re unwell. It’s an actual,…

I’ll say it again here: I think what’s bothering me most about the comments is that people are assuming because she’s “being a bad friend” to the letter writer that she’s not doing her work. The work is HARD. it’s really hard. and shit is messed up while you’re going through it. I don’t really understand why people…

thiiis. 

it’s an escape from the shit in the mind. it’s a coping mechanism. 

You’re assuming she can, is able to, and wants to participate in the same activities she used to. Just because she says she has no one to talk to doesn’t mean she wants to sit down and have a serious talk. Being a friend isn’t trying to fix her problem so it feels better for you, it’s being there in the moment while…

I’ve been there for friends a lot but I also know how to set boundaries and direct them towards help. I think what’s bothering me most about the comments is the assumption that *she’s not working on herself* because she doesn’t want to go out like she used to, and because of that *she’s* a bad friend. That’s...honestly…

There are a lot of people who accuse others of being a bad friend but literally never do the work to understand that friend’s limitations and constantly ignore the friend’s signals to do something else. They’re bad friends. 

Let me also point this out in BIG NEON LETTERS FOR YOU: Socializing on the internet does not equate to socializing in real life in actual situations no matter how you want to think about it, and it does NOT equate to being well. there are plenty of agoraphobe shutins who are all over the internet. There are PLENTY of…

No, she’s expecting her friend to be like she was. What’s really irking me is how many people are automatically assuming the friend is not doing her work. Here’s the thing: even when you’re DOING THE WORK you’re still experiencing symptoms. It’s absolutely unfair to expect her friend to want to be just like she was in…