God, how cold-hearted can you be? Doesn’t this guy know how much Family Matters?

Well goddamn.

For god’s sake, the man just learned how to print his name and already you expect for him to have mastered numbers? Can’t we just let him drink from his sippy cup in peace?

I haven’t been this excited to see a pixelated blue square leap over a red one since the first time I played the Atari 2600.

The finest kind (of strawmen)

LOL, why is this being described as “likely” a joke. Is likely the new “allegedly”?

It’s hard to picture a happy ending for the cow, who may pose a danger to the herd if she successfully mates with one of their members.

What are you guys mining these days? Ethereum? I know just enough about modern trends in crypto to know that if you’re running your own mining machine you’re probably using dedicated, highly parallelized ASIC boxes becuase that’s been going on for a while, but I’m not hip enough to know which coins people think are…

He could DEFINITELY get it.

Six horse cops rode into the fracas to break it up.

Just spitballing here but what abut mien muffing?

Coming in, both barrels blazing, like Jayson Williams.

“...African-Americans believe that they migrated to America in chains...”

Old Donny has a pea shooter, I suspect.

Jason Wood? More like Chasin Wood, amirite?

You know what they say - if you want it, put your name on it.

So which of my cryptocoins does this profound and insightful service accept? Bitcoin? Altcoin? Gelagegkeragjkndcoin?

I want to like this so damn much, but you’re sitting at 69 stars as I type this and I refuse to be the one who ruins that.

Nice try, but there’s no way that a man with the entire FIAT-Chrysler enterprise at his disposal needs outside help to figure out the best way to kill people.

Basically.