This is quite a shock, since there has been virtually no substance at ESPN for many years now.

I know that he made it the old-fashioned way.

and the official in the video literally says “Roethlisberger completes the pass.....”

Dude, defining a catch shouldn’t be that hard. But here we are, bickering about semantics. If you think this rule is good you’re either dense or a Pats fan (possibly both).

That’s because the jokes aren’t inspired by the need to communicate and connect, like those of actual good comedians. They’re inspired by the need to troll their imagined enemies.

It’s actually quite remarkable: he managed to endorse two losing candidates for the same Senate seat!

Considering the murder rate in Nola, I’d take my chances in the “bum-fuck” suburbs. Though the wisest thing if you aren’t a swamp person is to just stay the fuck out of Louisiana.

Saints fans keep this up and maybe the players will start wearing paper bags so they aren’t seen near these morons.

They’re asking Pujols to play first base? He’s the worst player in the league. They should ask him to switch to Salt Lake. He already costs them $114M. They shouldn’t let him cost them wins as well.

Six years ago: “Oh yeah, we received notice Albert had some recent problems with his foot, but it’s probably nothing...”

They’re the NYC version of the fucking Beverly Hillbillies. Between the Gaslighter In Chief’s total lack of knowledge of basic stuff like the Civil War and his monstrous TV and eating habits, to Ivanka’s misuse and misspelling of words, to Uday and Qusay’s utter tone deafness, it is a fucking moron convention. And to…

Hey look there is a bunch of grey Yinzers calling Tomlin racist things! Color me unshocked.

Momma always told me “If you can’t be funny, at least be verbose”

Drink less, or no, alcohol. Don’t do drugs.

It’s genuinely strange that, despite being fabulously wealthy and one of the most accomplished professional athletes in history, Brady is so proudly and steadfastly committing to his post-football pivot of becoming a literal snake-oil salesman.

I am quite certain that these people probably never went out of their way to vote before. The nice thing about being rich in America (and most places) is that you can be fairly certain that no matter who is in power your interests will be protected. Moreover, the real way to influence policy is to be liberal with…

Does anyone care how Marlins Man is doing?

Got to know when to cast ‘em, know when to outlast ‘em,

No, they’re not. Look, the narrative of the Yankees buying championships is a) nonsense, and always has been nonsense, since baseball is too probabilistic for the richest team to always win (see: LA Dodgers 2017), and b) old news since the Yankees haven’t been spend-crazy in quite awhile (ok, there was 2008, but when…

Spanish-American War. He fired it up as Secretary of the Navy then resigned to found his Rough Riders and went over to fight in Cuba.