Congratulations. You're the only person on earth who saw it that way.

I think Deadspin should republish the article itself (and not just link a blog post.)

But the NFL isn't a corporation. It is a "charitable organization."

Years ago, while working in a video store, I waited on Stuart Pankin from Not Necessarily The News. That's all I've got.

I'm imagining a billionaire owner, after seeing a line item in the budget increase substantially in cost, removing the costly item.

So....

There is no contradiction in his mind. If he did it, it wasn't wrong. Whereas anything one of 'those people' do is inherently wrong.

That only works on brat children when they're not armed.

He is exactly who they want representing them. Unrelenting psychopaths rarely lose negotiations.

I love his 'I didn't do it/she started it' excuse.

There is an unnamed strata to this whole citizenship game. Those who aren't already aware of it, will never benefit from it.

If people see a penis in Padma Lakshmi's bikini bottom, no one will ever mistake what I have for anything less again.

I'm sure there is at least one other person, but he's wrong too.

#fullyembalmed

If I'm preparing for the [insert end of world scenario here], I think being vaccinated for any and all infectious diseases would be first on the list.

I'm investing in iron lung manufacturers as we speak.

I want to live in a world where more people inform religious leaders that the nonsense they spew is, indeed, nonsense.

This business already exists (I suspect they were a large part of finding and incarcerating this fucking guy.) It exists for those who can afford it.

Your neighbor has good taste in cars.

I owned one 15 years ago. I still miss it today.