You will pry diet coke out of my cold, dead hands.

;-)

Me too.

I just remind her that dihydrogen monoxide is a mixture of rocket fuel and a oxider that is also a potent neuropoison.

My mom believes bacon is good for you and she’s a nurse so this announcement is trash.

Meat forever, vegetarian never!

Yay, BACON!

Yeah nah. I’m sure we could cut out all bacon and other delicious meats, cheeses that may be high in fat, dairy in general, alcohol, caffeine, cake, all manner of wonderful but not so great for you things and end up adding an extra few years on at the end.

Lolz. You’ve bought into the absurd notion that the reason that Islamic Jihad exists is because of poverty. It has nothing to do with poverty and instead, it has everything to do with their faith.

The North American Meat Institute

He’s demanding his entire happy career wishlist so that he can make the job worth his time, and he has a lot of exit doors if he isn’t getting his way. “You want a leader? Okay, okay, I’ll be your leader, but only if you guys metaphorically suck my dick.... you’re sick of sucking my dick now? That’s cool, guess you…

Although that is also an excellent point, I think his real excuse is even bigger than that: Paul Ryan doesn’t want to be Speaker of the House because he knows that trying to manage his splintered party will likely be the end of his political career.

Am I the only one who thinks Sheryl Sandberg’s “Lean In” movement (or whatever you want to call it) is a complete crock of bullshit?

Hi ya, i broke my leg. MY BLOGGING LEG

To me the most difficult thing is that there is no easy solution. Nothing besides “take your husbands name” has become even marginally mainstream enough to not merit side eye and questions. Even as other traditional tropes go away as an overwhelming number of people disengage (sex before marriage! Living together…

This had been my plan for a long time. When I was at my last job, I was in charge of creating and altering user accounts and permissions for various computer systems. We would get these rename requests, mostly people who had been recently married. One lady was Miss Smith and she apparently married a Mr. Wilson so she…

I kept my last name, officially. I own a business. It seemed logical and less messy. We both have boring white kid names so changing it wouldn’t have helped with the constant identity confusion anyway. However, my husband and I do have a combined last name that we go by socially/Facebook and stuff. Dustin and Fisher…

Our names made a ridiculously bad portmanteau, and so we ended up just deciding which one to keep. We went with his, but it meant a lot to me that his first question was, “so what should we make our last name be?”