If he would have sold MAGA or Freedom Masks with his logo on it he would have made a fuckton of money and slid his way to an easy re-election.

Maybe they should have consulted with Jeff Bezos. He knows a little bit about logistics...

“It will cost too much money!" said no republican, ever, about a cause they supported.

Dump has the anti-Midas touch—everything he comes near turns to shit.

It’s so completely obvious that everyone feels they have to wait for Biden to take office in order to get anything organized, and as infuriating as it is, I can’t blame them. I wouldn’t trust the Dump administration to keep a fern alive.

“Operation Warp Speed” = “Operation Pass the Buck”. The federal government passed the responsibility on to the state govts, who have passed it on to local administrators, none of whom are communicating with each other.

He was actually just arrested, thank god.

I’m slightly disappointed in myself for continuously being shocked how utterly inept this administration is. I mean, this was their damn flagship project. This was what they build as their shining gem. Of course it was going to be a disaster as Trump has such a failure touch that it is astonishing, but still.

I’m heaving a big, resigned sigh over here.

Really, the only question with this administration is how big the fuck-up will be. I’m only surprised that they didn’t transport the doses in the back of pickup trucks, without bothering to refrigerate them, then end up dumping it all into the Potomac and delivering syringes filled with disinfectant instead.

From Atlas Shrugged: “I came here in order to bring up my sons as human beings. I would not surrender them to the educational systems devised to stunt a child’s brain, to convince him that reason is impotent, that existence is an irrational chaos with which he’s unable to deal, and thus reduce him to a state of…

Huh, I pretty much just assumed most of the jokes that weren’t immediately obvious references were just absurdism.

This so totally reminds me of when Homer is criticizing Marge’s name choices for their first born -- Marge says “Larry” and Homer objects saying he’d be called “Larry the Fairy,” and the name Marcus would be changed to “Mucus.”  Then, when Marge suggests Bart, Homer says “Bart... Cart...Dart....Eeeeyart.... nope!…

The line “Ever see a guy say goodbye to a shoe?” is funny on its own because of the over-the-top character of Hank Scorpio and A(lbert) Brooks’ delivery.

a buddy just sent me the ‘oh boy sleep! that’s where i’m a viking!’ thread and i was shocked to learn it’s widely thought that ralph was saying ‘i’m a viking at sleeping’, not ‘when i sleep i dream i’m a viking’, which to me is the only possible interpretation.

Ellen deserves all the bouquets for being a pioneer, for opening doors for gays, for her hard work, talent and perseverance in making it in Hollywood.

Certainly made sure everyone understood that he’s not actually related to this brown person, didn’t he?

Nothing says “Father of the Year” like publicly declaring that kid that keeps popping up in publicity photos as Random Intern is your adopted son as political one-upmanship 

Holy fuck. He went from “I have a black friend” to “I have a brown son” as an excuse for his bigotry in no time flat.

On the Gaetz item, I even went and read the article behind the link and I still can’t make any sense what he is trying to achieve here. And yeah, I get the dunking on the Dems part, but it is just absurd.