Dear Random Canadian “comedian” -

I am rarely serious and earnest posting here but as a disabled Veteran and the husband of a VA Social Worker who works with homeless Vets, please allow me to thank you for the work you do.

In related news, ESPN has declined to renew Tom Brady, Sr’s contract. Brady Sr has signed a development deal with Showtime.

“Hey, Rog? How’s about you <Cartman>suck mah balls</Cartman>?”

There are many, many more reasons to hate Houston...

Ironically, Swinney announced the ban on his Facebook page.

...notFloridanotFloridanotFlorida...

Paging Sarah McLachlan...Ms McLachlan, we have a Corgi in crisis, second step from the top...

Paging Sarah McLachlan...Ms McLachlan, we have a Corgi in crisis, second step from the top...

Paging Sarah McLachlan...Ms McLachlan, we have a Corgi in crisis, second step from the top...

Paging Sarah McLachlan...Ms McLachlan, we have a Corgi in crisis, second step from the top...

Paging Sarah McLachlan...Ms McLachlan, we have a Corgi in crisis, second step from the top...

The only thing that Brady should have done differently is that when asked to produce his personal phone for analysis, he should have been more direct and said, “Are you out of your f*cking mind?”

Pretty sure ESPN knew this was coming.

That’s goldfishist.

“...my dad has maintained his weekly pedicure appointment where he gets his two big toes painted black and the rest of the little piggies painted silver (just like their sparkly helmets). My dad also still wears leather pants on the regular and tried to buy a goddamn used hearse to drive to the Coliseum.”

Ouch.

“...a town located in the armpit of our worst state”

I used to fuck guys like you at Gawker.

The only way this could be a more Canadian headline is if it started with “Mounted Police” and ended with “eh?”