Patton Oswalt just posted a very funny series of tweets with the hashtag #CareerEndingTwitterTypos. None of them are featured here. It started a bunch of other people also posting funny tweets on that theme, only one of which is posted here.

Think about it.

The divorce proceedings are expected to move smoothly thanks to California's A-DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHHHHH statute.

Oh definitely, the guy who hangs out with lizard people conspiracy theorists, humiliates homeless people in front of a studio audience and tells young people not to vote deserves our respect and our love, because instead of saying inane things about inane topics, he's saying inane things about important topics. Yes…

All you have to do is pee into a fountain the same time as a golden retriever, and the same time that lightning strikes it. Right? That's how he happened, right?

How's the weather up there in Russell Brand's colon, gawker?

I blame this guy:

I am your age, and I can tell you this happened. I heard the term "date rape" for the first time in the 80's and there were public education campaigns about it back then and scandalous trials and tv movies all about it. There was one right here in my town involving seven college men. There was also an attitude that…

Awwwwwwww. Poor Baby Giraffe Doctor.

I have debated that it is possibly meaningless and yet I can't keep from using it from time to time. Sometimes people are just such hipsters. :)

From Radar:

And now that all of the denialists have come out of the woodwork, I'm wondering how many people are aware that some of them are potentially being paid: http://www.dailykos.com/story/2013/10/…

I don't know - this explanation doesn't make sense. I mean, even TV shows manage to have the occasional baby appearance and they have a much lower budget than a movie. I assume there must be some Twilight reason behind this - like, the baby has to have little fangs or something? I haven't read the book (I'm with you,…

ALL ABOARD THE NOPE TRAIN, LEAVING FOR FUCK THIS SHITVILLE.

Transformer is one of my favourite albums of all time. It really stirred me up, shook me, and never put the pieces back together. A fitting name. Thank you Lou.

"You are an innovator."