I refuse to start Christmas season until after Thanksgiving. I may have all my shopping done by the middle of October, but that’s because I hate people and won’t go to stores if they’re busy. I also loathe most of the secular “Christmas songs”, even though I’m not at all religious. It’s just that

Exactly. There’s no invisible marker only police can see with their mirrored shades that lights up when people are defrauding the unemployment system. According to worldpopulationreview.com, which is the first result that pops up on google, this is the racial makeup of California:

I scanned through the 78-page document they wrote to charge him, and now I know WAY more about him than I ever wanted to know, and I have to go take a shower.

I hear that Pete’s doing well.  I just checked his instagram and he looks sober and happy - I don’t claim to be able to tell if people are actually sober and/or happy by a picture, but he looks that way.

I know Stacey Abrams wants to be Governor of Georgia, though as a non-resident of Georgia, I really appreciate the good she does for all the states, not just Georgia.  She really spreads the benefits of her talents across the country.

This is even stupider than it sounds. I’m a random person living in the suburbs of Washington DC. I knew there was going to be a riot at the Capitol on January 6th before January 6th, that the rioters were going to be the followers of Cheeto Voldemort, that because his followers were Nazis and white supremacists and…

Someone removing the plates is the one thing I don’t find odd. I bet it’s unrelated to Day’s death. Kids were walking through the woods and found the car and took the plates as souvenirs.  Or college kids took them to stick up on their walls.  Or someone took them to put on a stolen car.  I’ve had plates stolen before.

I’m sure that Vice President Harris, a more-than-competent adult woman who ran on and was fully part of the winning ticket for President and VP of the United States, is just thrilled to pieces that a self-important guy is going to talk about her to another guy so that they can decide what the first guy thinks her job…

In support of his mother, if I was ever found drowned in a river in some strange woods apparently having gone skinny dipping, everyone who knows me would be 100% certain foul play was involved. In woods I don’t know? In a river of uncertain chemical content? Naked in that river? Oh HELL no.

Maybe they softened the paint somehow before scraping so they were just pushing it off the metal...  I hope.

She has all that money and all those people who can do things for her and still no one who can hem her pants so they don’t drag on the floor?  I realize I’m channeling my grandmother, but good god.  

If Beloved doesn’t give you nightmares, you haven’t read it carefully enough. That is a positive comment on Toni Morrison’s evocative prose and astonishing gift for writing, not a negative comment on the book. Books that can bring up that much emotion and feeling are rare and the authors who can write them are…

Random thought: don’t host SNL if you are newly out of rehab. Rumor has it that substances with which you can chemically enhance your evening abound.

I don’t think she’s a whore (and if she was I wouldn’t care) but I’ve never liked her.  I don’t know why.  One of those things where you see someone and think that the two of you wouldn’t be friends.  She’d probably think the same about me.

I had to be able to stop on the steep hill near me and get going three times in a row without stalling before my mother would let me off the neighborhood streets.  This included making it into 2nd.  It was a 72 VW Bus, and getting that thing into 2nd worked maybe half the time until you learned the secret, which…

Also stupid: if you have 4wd, you can drive on ice and snow the same way you drive on dry pavement. 4wd lets you get going better, but ice respects no one and will send you off the road just as fast as a car with 2wd, especially if you slam on your brakes.

My 1991 Lexus LS 400 (handed down from my sister the doctor, the original owner, to my dad to my uncle to me) took premium, and as I was driving it in 2013 I figured it had earned it. I loved that car. It had a built in car phone. It was like driving the Batmobile. It gave its life when it was T-boned right behind my…

It’s not so much that I hate the Beatles. I like the Beatles. I especially like George Harrison.  But I can’t miss them if they never go away.

Not a boomer, just someone who worked for phone companies whose job was to figure out what could go wrong.

Babytrapping!  New word for me, and an excellent one to describe this situation.