. . .and how to make her GI tract sad :(.

Buddy, they don't even let me fuck it.

Seriously. By far the funniest Twitter account, and it's been consistently funny for years without a dip in quality.

That first Vine is beyond terrible and lazy. I was readjusting my collar with my index finger just watching it.

Nope. Have fun continuing to get disgusted by people who refuse to patronize child rapists or whatever the fuck your point was.

You are insanely full of yourself. It's remarkable that you can't comprehend what I'm saying. All I'm saying is that I ignore them as an artist. There is NO pretending that something never existed. I have no idea why you'd think that is even necessary. I simply don't patronize the art anymore. It is THAT SIMPLE. Jesus…

I picture you putting on some sunglasses and walking suavely away directly into a door jamb.

Do you like Henry Rollins at all? His podcast, Henry & Heidi, is pretty great if you enjoy his story-telling. I just recently listened to his episode of Hubert Selby, Jr. stories, and it was so good that I downloaded a bunch of Selby interviews off of youtube and am halfway through 'The Room'.

I've said it before and I'll say it again: Germans love John Rudnitsky.

With any luck, it'll be Jost 0.0 so there will still be a chance that he could branch off in a different direction and actually be funny/entertaining.

Ignorant of what? Disgusted of what? You've said absolutely nothing and acted superior and insulting. What exactly needs clarification here? If someone does something I consider morally reprehensible, I write them off completely as an artist. I no longer care what they produce. I want them prosecuted as criminals, but…

So, my approach of letting everyone do whatever they want in regards to their relationship with art without judgment strikes you as 'simple-minded' and 'ignorant'? How about fuck off?

Norman Mailer was also a terrible writer who wrote as though his penis were his quill and his testicles were his reservoir of ink. Also a huge blowhard, but this is just my own opinion.

You wouldn't be talking about Orson Scott Card would you?

Paint my chicken coup!

I recently got something in the mail from them asking me to fill out a short survey, as they feel like I would be useful for their ratings system thing. Inside, along with the short survey, was an actual, insanely crisp $5 bill as a thank you for my participation. I threw the survey out and got me a $5 box meal from…

This will be buried and no one will read it, but here's the way I approach RP: first and foremost, he raped a child. Therefore, I don't care about anything he produces. Am I robbing myself of artistic enjoyment? Sure. But there's literally hundred of thousands (possibly millions) of movies in existence. Life is only…

American Pie 69: <—- Get a Load of This Clever Title We Made; And Also Just Now When We Said 'Load'

I can't explain it either, but whenever I see it, I not only smile, I full-on laugh out loud. If I had the power, I would make up a category and award that guy an Oscar.

My absolute favorite part of this movie is the 'blblblubulbblblb! Face! haha, Douche!' part seen here: