Because pushing something to the unregulated black market is always the best way to go.

When I quit heroin I locked myself in a room for a month. But THIS fuckin guy...

Ohio is a dump

A Facebook- and Twitter-less world?  Doesn’t sound too bad ...

It takes five to seven years for a single ramp to produce seeds

What’re those two extra doors towards the back for?

#outwiththeold2020

Please go and vote

Can’t Twitter just block that dude like they did InfoWars?

There was a restaurant in Nashville bout seven years ago had the power go out, so they were using dry ice to keep the produce cold. Chef “accidentally” locked himself in there (escape button broke, apparently) and died right in there with the salad. The ol’ Chef’s Special.

Risotto AND farro? As in, farro as an add-in to the risotto?

Calculating the one pill that put those 42,000 people over the edge, equals like, 116-years-worth of 1-month prescriptions? Not counting all the others that got them there. That’s a lot of pills.

One question I have is, how will this ash plume affect the mainland’s weather, if at all? Will we have a mild summer? Will winter in the midwest be suckass cold again? I guess that’s two questions. Three?

Clutch, Clutch: Texan Book of the Dead/Spacegrass/I Have the Body of John Wilkes Booth

I got popped for speeding and the officer said she could see me grab for the seatbelt through my rear windows as I was pulling over, and tried to ticket me for that on top of no front plate and the speeding. I knew it was baloney because a). I drove a quick little lowrider minitruck and barely trusted myself behind…

I once owned a 2006 Mini Cooper R50, and after too many bad heel-toe attempts and ill-advised drops-into-third, I blew out the clutch and traded it in. For a Corolla.  I am afraid if I see that car again, I will fall into an immediate, tear-filled, stupor and uncontrollably divert my direction into the next bridge…

I am the paper towel

What’s with the photoshopped iPhone there?