IKR? Something about Douthat has always aggravated me in particular. He is far too young to be such a pearl-clutching granny. I feel he should know better. In fact, I think he does. But his deep, deep fear of his own sexuality has hobbled him in his ability to confront and accept the modern world as it is, leading to…

Damn 39! He looks like a failed attempt at cloning Orson Welles

This dude is 39 years old.

Hey, I know we’re proud of our incredible 50% turnout in the midterms, but remember all those elections nobody participated in that paved the way for absurd gerrymandering? I GUESS THAT WASN’T SUCH A GREAT IDEA!

Anytime I hear a phone conversation going on in a bathroom, I immediately flush the closest toilet, whether I need to or not (as in, I’m still going or just walking by on my way to a stall). It’s only fair to the person on the other end of the line.

I walked into an unlocked individual shitter a while back, and there’s a guy there checking his hair in the mirror.

This is very sweet. Could be a Hallmark movie.

So there was a contest held by Coleco in 1983 when I was baaaaarely a year old and my mother, a deeply competitive and shallow person, decided that I was going to have a cabbage patch doll. She entered me in the contest, then started conniving for ways to get a doll by other means as well.

We have really loud hand driers in our bathrooms that you can hear from pretty much any office.  If someone walks out of the bathroom without that jet engine going off, we all shame them until they go back and at least pretend to wash their hands.

I used to work with a guy who would often eat in the bathroom. Maybe like once a month, I would see him standing at the sink with a plate of food.. He would put the plate on the counter next to the sink. And he would eat his food there. It was usually when the company bought us lunch. And more often than not, our…

My uncle-by-marriage was a no good, womanizing liar and crook who made himself a millionaire “working” with LA drug dealers and gangsters.

...which meant that he totally was able to get his hands on dolls for every kid in our family during the peak craze. None of the adults asked how he got them and it was literally…

You know we’re in for a hell of a season when the show opens with Lala walking down the street and talking about how she likes to weigh between 120 and 123 pounds. Reach for the stars, Lala. Reach for the stars.

MPAA ratings are a farce and, frankly, an anachronism. In the age of the internet, do we really need some cabal board telling us what movies are “appropriate” for this age group or that? The worst part about it is that it influences directly the content, as the desire film studios edit many films so that they fit the…

I feel like I’m going a little crazy here. Yes, Nancy Pelosi is old, and she often spits out politician-y platitudes at polititian-y times. She was also ridiculously effective in kneecapping the latter years of the Bush administration. She’s the first woman to ever be speaker of the house. I don’t see why we should be…

tl;dr congratulations to “progressives” helping set up a pointless Speaker battle to ensure the Democratic majority gets off to a shit start

I’m not sure what people expected she won a seat by less that 3 percentage points, in a race that hadn’t been won by a democrat in 30 years, and has a history of being a vote republicans can sometimes count on.

Yeah, this is a weak attempt at outrage. She gave a meaningless non-answer to a journalist she didn’t give a damn about.

Oh, she’s fine; untwist your panties. I’m glad she told the Daily Caller creep that she was trying to get away from him. The Daily Caller needs to be told that more often.

Calm those tits, guy! She’s not even in office yet. Also, she’s on our side. Keep in mind that a Democrat in Arizona is, and kind of has to be, different from a Democrat elsewhere.  We’re lucky to have the seat.  

Pelosi is a bit of a honey badger. She doesn’t care what attacks get lobbed at her, she stays focused on getting a reasonable though not comprehensive list of things done. It’s never enough for unrealistic liberals and it’s way too much for conservatives.