It turns out that the Great Glass Elevator is actually a TARDIS with a broken chameleon circuit that makes it look like an elevator all the time. Willy Wonka is one of the many personas of The Master, who is looking to brainwash young Charlie into killing The Doctor. The oompa loompas are actually aliens cruelly…

Wonka: The Rise of Slugworth

It should be a prequel. A young William Wonka fights in the Vietnam war, loses his mind after wiping out a village. Adopts a whimsical persona. Recruits Vietnamese people deformed by Agent Orange, which turned their skin orange. Opens a candy factory. Ruthlessly destroys any competing candy factories. It’s not a…

African or European swallows?

Proving yet again that Wikipedia is not a reliable source, there doesn’t seem to be any section devoted to deaths caused by coconuts dropped by swallows.

This topic is nuts.

This is the first Winter Olympics in which single figure skaters can perform to music with lyrics, allowing for some wonderful creative freedom. Germany’s Paul Fentz has chosen to use it to treat the world to Paul Anka’s swing jazz cover of “Wonderwall.”

Lobo is this weird character that started out as too unsubtle a parody of Wolverine/Liefeld-era comics for me to really find all that funny, but enough people seemed to miss the satire that DC just shrugged and folded him into the mainstream universe, which made him unbearable. So even if you could argue that playing…

Yeah problem with this is that Lobo is supposed to be a parody of Liefeldian-style anti-heroes. Michael Bay will only play the character completely straight. This is like getting an Objectivist to make a Superman movie, which has already been proven to be a terrible idea.

Lobo, bring back Sheriff Lobo! Lobo! Lobo!

I mean, he’s cool but rude

Wow, based off the Turtles (and voices) from the first movie.

Don’t waste the pizza

Donald Glover looks badass!

lol

I always knew Tarantino was an asshole, but... not quite at this level. His behavior and treatment of Uma (along with Weinstein’s, obviously) is disgusting. There should be repercussions for Quentin’s absurd negligence.

If this series gets cancelled, you can bet the new head of programming, Rollo Tomasi, is to blame.