“PUNCH MY BAG! PUNCH MY BAAAAAA-ARRGH!”

“I really thought the Bear Event would go over better.”

“Look, people are tired of rapey shit, okay, and I’m a victim of that because of some of the rapey shit I’ve done in the past. Look around at all the rapey people getting yelled at and fired! Why, this is a pogrom of self-centered rapers and I just won’t stand for it!”

“An lo Twitch did say unto no underboob and no nipple, for in this layeth damnation.  Behold, thou must suffice thyself with horse masks and slurping noises unto the end of thine terms of service.”

I would watch the fuck out of that Constantine movie they riffed about.

I enjoy many things about Alaska.

“You gonna be nice to this guy, right?”

“Isn’t that the homeless guy that hangs out around here, hoping that some of us overpaid bigotry-factory workers will give him some of our hate money?”

Wait, are you telling me Tig from SoA isn’t a stable role model for my behavior?!

Antreefa strikes again.

That much extra ammo, the bit of a gut, and his lack of height tells you all you need to know about this guy. That is a dangerous and unhinged Napoleon of a specimen right there.

This guy made a dull movie that his audience didn’t want to watch (pedantic disaster flick, anyone? No?) and then got mad that people instead focused on interesting gossip between a celebrity and Adam McKay.

I read that as “self eating vacuum” and immediatly had a fucked up Dean Koontz plot flash through my head.

This is the type of journalism I come here to see, people.

She got home and was SO PISSED when that was the first thing her racist husband pointed out.

Gizmodo: “Chinese rockets that mess with the atmosphere are bad and will do bad stuff! Bad!”

Axios: “If you young people don’t start fucking bigots due to their hateful and rage-fueled bigotry, they are going to get more bigoted!”

Psh, firing rockets at the sky in order to make it behave?

Why else would we come here?!

Oh fuck, if they did this up here in Alaska everyone would be licking doorknobs and flesh-hugging each other left and right.