It just now dawned on me: orange juice mayonnaise would be fucking disgusting.

What the Hell, Man?

“It’s real to me”

Inspired by the prank, A-Rod hit a home run that day. It was a Solo shot.

“I don’t know man. Is there a mirror in the room with the cup?” - A-Rod

Well looks like I have a new favorite Plummer in the NFL (Sorry, Tomsula).

Promotion: First 10,000 Rockies fans get Dingers on their cars!

We are a stupid, stupid country.

What’s worse, the duffel bag had a history of carrying weapons.

I’m the one on the left.

“Heaven help us if one of the conditions is to pee in a bottle.”

I imagine if Manziel’s next hearing lasts for too long, his legal team won’t be the only ones experiencing withdrawal.

Today’s loss was due to lingering post-9/11 malaise, you insensitive herb.

Well yes. No one wants to see me with my shirt off even me.

Because there are pictures of shirtless Cardinals after winning an NLDS series.

“This is some Silicon Valley hogwash”

Joe Lacob: [Angrily instructs attorney to begin search for plaintiffs who can claim Deadspin committed defamation]

The world is far too crowded with people who vastly overestimate their own importance.

Trout? Wait, better answer!

Wait, really? I think “goals change games” deserves to be celebrated in the annals of incisive sports commentary.