Any Carmax car during the 5 day return window

Yeah, I learned with crazy shit like that, but on one lane mountain roads. Not official, of course.

Will the Honda Engine Fit?

Alanis, don’t take it personally. We all say things we don’t mean when we’re waiting in a service department for hours on end. Their frustration will inevitably lessen once they trade it in for something else.

As an extreme zealot of the Church of Jalopnik I prostrate myself extremely and recount the Ten Car-mandments from last week:

Hey, Hey, Hey, settle down! You can’t just go out and buy five AMCs at once. You’ve got to.....

Dunno, those are some nice takatas there.

“ she didn’t know she hit him”. Oh, okay, so your best defense is a reckless disregard for use of a fucking firearm? Like, I deal with a lot of homeless folks. Thanks to our broken mental health system, a lack of social services, and rampant drug abuse, it is totally possible for a homeless guy to, for want of a…

Straight outa Compton

Suzuki, that’s why it was replaced with a rotary.

“...the Lord Jesus will kill with the breath of his mouth...”

If you’re not sure how to drive stick shift perhaps these fine fellows can help:

Looks like Reilly Reid to me. Which I swear I only know because of a college research project or something.

Just the other day, I was having breakfast at an outdoor cafe, and a car pulls into a parallel spot NOSE FIRST. Takes a couple of back and forths, and then gives up and moves on. How in the fuck do people not retain this most basic parking technique when they were taught to do it properly in high school?

Is there any way we can make you the patron saint of automotive repair?

Or help out a guy and make a friend out of the deal. It never hurts to have more friends. A free jeep that will need more work is worth less than a new friend.

The other Jalops therefore said unto him, “we have seen the S2000.” But he said unto them, “except I shall see in my hands the keys of such Honda, and put my hand onto the gearshift, and thrust my feet upon the pedals, I will not believe.”

The secret to keeping the landlord from complaining about the big ruts in the lawn is to cover the entire lawn with Jeeps so he can’t see it?

Seriously, I don’t see a piston ring on your finger.

I wouldn’t worry, you’re small. Your organs wouldn’t get much money on the black market.