WHO WILL READ MY EROTIC GIMME A BREAK FANFICTION NOW, GAWDAMMIT

I keep the sauce and the pasta separate, then ladle the cheese over the macaroni when I serve it. I don’t like baking my mac and cheese - I’d rather be eating it.

Only this time the ANIMALS have the guns!

But sometimes, you do have a mortgage to pay ... or school for your kids ... or your production company’s assistants ... or to sock the money away for that period in your career when you can’t BUY a job ... or if you want to retire to a quiet stretch of beach when YOU want to be done with the business ...

“They were either full of shit, or they were the smartest guys in the room.”

No Agents of SHIELD mention? Jeez, they got a seventh-season pickup BEFORE season six premieres this summer! What do they gotta do - besides be on anybody’s radar?

No Vince Gill? No “When I Call Your Name”? No “Don’t Let Our Love Start Slipping Away”? No “One More Last Chance”?

Agents of SHIELD. Season Five wasn’t as truly great as Season Four - but damn, it was worthy of at least one notice.

That scene is pretty damn amazing actually. I was roaring at the joke while simultaneously trying to tamp down my urge to vomit.

Emmanuelle’s Autoanimerotic Adventure

But is he actually a [SPIES IN DISGUISE TWIST]?

And the guy who checks the Radar Range is none other than Jonathan Banks!

Only if Acosta is a side character in an ensemble. Otherwise, it’ll be Clooney.

Watching Fallon absolutely losing his shit over every simple joke or impression he hears makes me wonder if jangling your keys in front of him would have the same effect.

“This one’s afraid of ... being murdered in his sleep by a wise-cracking demonic character with knives on his glove who shape-shifts into the form of his greatest fear?

My bologna’s got a first name/

The Potato Chip Sandwich is the pinnacle of cheap/college/bachelor food. Got three bucks? Congratulations, fella, you’re eating for a week!

I thought he’d already come back - in POG form.

The dinner table scene when Elliott shouts “PENIS-BREATH!” at his older brother, shocking - and almost delighting - his mother, has this wonderful familial authenticity to it, much like the scene in Jaws when Brody and his youngest son make faces at each other. I don’t think Spielberg gets much credit for being a direc…

In order to thank you for your star, a taste of my quotational adequatulance: