Meanwhile, in London:

“I was asked where I see myself in 5 years.”

This sounds like it would be fun:
“You’re defending Bill Cosby. What’s your summation?”
“If you knew I was scouting you, would you sooner cut off your pinkie toe or mine?”
“Why do you think suitcases hate gingers?”
“Ray Lewis definitely did it, right?”

Impressive but he's not even the only player that had a hat trick in one period last night. Eaves of the Stars did it as well.

“Good year for me from unemployed to the Super Bowl!”

“For the last time, Mr. Tomsula, you are not allowed to live in Levis Stadium!”

Think about what a colossal shithead you have to be to “undermine the reputation” of the Cleveland Browns.

If anyone should know about making up stories to profit off them, it’s Mitch Albom.

Innit great that for one moment we can put aside our differences of politics, race and socio-economics and talk about the things that really matter?

Our solar system is not symmetrical. So there’s that.

Counterpoint: Carson Palmer lost the damn game.

I can’t wait to read the op-ed about how this happened because Cam Newton is a disrespectful football player.

If Carolina wins, we may be drowned by the suffocating number of hot (and thinly veiled racist) takes contrasting old school Peyton Manning and the brash Cam Newton.

I’m not sure - the Panthers were pretty much exposed in their two losses in the regular season.

When reached for comment, Dan Gilbert issued the attached response.

Has this fucking guy seen the men who’ve coached the Browns?

Also important to mention that the passage this past November of Proposition 3 allowing state officials to live outside Austin means that Paxton could feasibly continue to serve as attorney general from prison when he is convicted.

Or the fact that by his previous actions he has shown he is basically not competent to offer interpretations of law at all. That should be pretty high up in the article.

No article about the activities of Ken Paxton would be complete without a mention that he was indicted for securities fraud nine months after being elected Attorney General.

Actually, insofar as Deadspin has a unified position on the matter—which we don’t—it’s that daily fantasy is a hell of a lot of fun. That doesn’t change the facts that daily fantasy operators are scuzzy and that daily fantasy is obviously gambling.