Is it possible for some of our readers to get vegan nothing burgers? I don't want them to feel like we're not being sensitive to their needs.

I'm from DE, a state with maybe 25 people in it, so I know Joe personally, and he is just as dope IRL.

This is why Joe Biden is my fantasy internet boyfriend. He gets so much shit for gaffes when 99% of the time, he's the smartest and most compelling guy in the room. Of course he would say this. Of course. I love him so much.

Someone's going to do it...

Yes. To me Dumbledore was basically my grandpa and therefore he never kissed (when I picked the books up in fifth grade) or later had sex with ANYONE.

It's a thing, I guess. Reading the books, it seemed obvious but I thought I was just projecting. If you're gay, you notice it. If you're not gay, you need to take a moment, like when your favorite uncle finally comes out. Some get over the moment, and some start throwing the cranberry sauce.

I'll admit I never thought Dumbledore was gay, but then again I never considered the sexuality/relationship status of any of the characters unless a relationship was mentioned.

I was unfortunate enough to get to see "The Miracle of Life" when I was 15 (science class + the 90s = actual science shit being taught). It features an episiotomy. I had to stop myself from screaming when I saw that scene, and thus began my 15+ years of saying "FUCK NO" to child birth.

Yes, look back at the posts regarding Sam before the NFL draft. Many non football fans suddenly became Mel Kipers trying to argue that either he was the next Lawrence Taylor or horrible and not worthy of a pick- which side they were on depended on their views on his announcement.

Please cross post on Gawker so we can hear the EPL fan hipsters who would never root for a mainstream American sport suddenly become NFL personnel experts.

Probably the only black man recently to say "Oh no, I have to leave St. Louis."

Hey Kirk, you really shouldn't be alienating all us Jews and Muslims and Hindus and other non-Christmas-celebrators out there with this "war on Christmas" stuff. Know why? Because we're the ones who have your back and are constantly reminding people that Christmas is about Christ. Casual Christian person: "Why don't…

"Who knows what "Happy Holidays" even means??"

Oh, for fuck's sake... Are you REALLY going to pull out some victim card because of someone's defense mechanisms they've cultivated due to being around a culture (football AND the US) that looks down on and torments gays? Wow. I imagine you as a white guy that also uses the phrase "reverse racism" because you're…

The irony being that a steady diet of Taco Bell means your heart will solidify within 3-6 months and you'll drop dead.
That being said, GET IN MA BELLY.

I'm not sure my septic system could handle a lifetime of Taco Bell. It's a chance I'd be willing to take though.

I would totally be okay with eating Taco Bell for most of my remaining life. It will be a short one.

And still others are angered by the fact that Sam has been the victim of an apparent double standard, wherein high-profile draftees like Johnny Manziel—white, rich, and straight—are celebrated for racking up endorsements and Instagramming themselves holding fistfuls of cash while Sam, who grew up in extreme poverty…

You're totally right; the way in which he has turned down most of his sponsorship opportunities, canceled the reality documentary after negative feedback, performed well in the preseason, and given one interview since being drafted by the Rams (in which he talked about how performing well in the preseason gave him…