Let me tell you all of the times I got caught smoking weed (I am an adorable white blonde lady from an affluent family)

Dude I laughed at the Mindy joke.

“Jus so you know, I’m having a steak tonight. If I have to actually kill a steer, I’m doing it.”

I’ll leave this here

How are this many people so new to the internet? And how did they end up on Kitchenette as their Orientation Day site?!

She also nailed it in terms of being on a morning show. Like she said it tactfully enough that those paying attention got it, but it’s not like children cover your ears!

I thought the clip had cut off before the offensive part, so I clicked the link (to nothing about this story) before coming back and realizing what was supposed to be the problem. George fucked up with the terrible wording and awkward pause.

My exact reaction. Like he teed that right up for her. It’s like an interviewer saying something like “Tell us what you do do.” Just don’t say do do, guys. His comment was awkward as hell. If someone said that to me, it would take ALL OF MY EFFORT not to say something similar.

“Chandler: Because we love kids. Love them to death. Well, not actually to death. That’s just a figure of speech. We love kids the appropriate amount... as allowed by law.”

You’re supposed to hold it

Maybe have the touch-id home button recognize swipes (for back, forward).

An autocorrect thats not so aggressive. its nearly impossible to write lingo or abbreviate without it correcting to something else.

Multiple user profiles for iPad please

Two things I have been waiting for forever, but I suspect will not come:

Group Facetime calls

You’re welcome.

To be fair, has anyone named Crystal ever exceeded our expectations?

YOU GUYS I want an actual Muslim president so bad. It doesn't even matter where he or she stands on the issues; it would be worth it just to watch these morons cry and shit themselves.