Poor car dealers. They should get a big bailout check from the government. But first, let’s step into the finance manager’s office and go over a few items....

At the end of the day, it’s a 5 bedroom house.

Seriously. I’ve already hit a point in my life at 27 where I can imagine exactly how much space is too much or too little for me. The size of the garage is considerable more important to me than a 1000sqft living room.

Stick to Sports

If I was that PR guy, I’d ask for a raise. And I’d send Jason a set of LED Pao taillights.

it’s always nice to see new readers, isn’t it?

Now I want a tailight. I only need two things:

Welcome!

I love this article. 

All of them are metal-dash death machines. CP.

What the fuck are you even rambling about?

Trying to sell stuff to the Boomers while they still can.

Big Tailight

Torch is already better than The Onion, at least anything they’ve done recently.

Auditioning for The Onion, are we?

It’s T O R C H L O P N I K

I also know a guy that can get BBS wheels cheap using stealies.

Lol because you’re in California, therefore you get to pay more for everything.

So then this isn’t even “nice price or crack pipe,” it’s just “do you, reader, lust for air-cooled Porches?”

You’re not buying a mid 80s aircooled Porsche because you want a Boxster or a Cayman.