During in a point in my life when I wasn't dating and never wore shorts/skirts/dresses, I stopped shaving my legs because I was all "why bother?"

For years I was worried my college boyfriend had committed suicide because I couldn't find anything on him and he had a history of attempts. Then he finally created a Facebook profile and first I was relieved. But then I was pissed because he has a kid when he told me he didn't want any.

I did it once after a first date out of sheer boredom at work and found out he was married. Now I always run a cursory search just to make sure nothing horrific jumps out. Interestingly, I went on a first date last date and he admitted to doing the same thing. Fortunately, I Google myself once in a while to make sure…

My commute was actually one of the least bad things about living in NYC. Now, take that with a huge grain of salt because I worked off-hours and didn't use the subway during rush. But keeping my work schedule that way meant I had 90 minutes reading time built into each work day, which I actually miss now that I'm a 15…

Tourists. Fuck tourists.

I once got stuck behind a group of slow walking European tourists and couldn't get around them or even through them. I got so pissed I pulled out my phone and had a fake conversation where I apologized for being late because "I'M STUCK BEHIND SOME GERMANS OR SOMETHING WHO WILL NOT GET OUT OF THE WAY! APPARENTLY THERE…

And yet I'm mocked for leaving NYC for a town not on that list.

From the Mayo Clinic webpage about anorexia (not that anorexia is the only eating disorder:)

I think they look silly all on their own, no mimicking necessary. But I feel that way about most posed portraits.

I had an organ removed once and have always regretted not asking to see it before they took it away. How often do you get to see your own internal organs? And not have it be a life threatening situation?

And if we complain about getting punched it's our fault because feminism.

I used to work Saturdays and more than once I worked up a head of steam over waiting for a bunch of people enjoying a leisurely weekend breakfast who were in line ahead of me. I ranted on Facebook about how there should be two lines on weekends, one for people who work weekends and one for people who had all the time…

I don't think I've ever seen a single man at my church. Unless he's 11.

Have you been to church lately?

"tl; dr"

This level of of examination of a stranger's body borders on mental illness.

Is it blended before or after the pie addition? Please say before.

The city income tax is one of the most bullshit things about living in NYC (the housing being the most bullshit thing.) I was paying $150 a month on top of federal and state taxes for police who didn't come when I called 911, a housing agency that didn't do anything when I reported mold and broken door locks, and a…

I earned what's usually considered a high salary there and the cost of living and taxes drove me out. Also, the general suckage. I now live in a state on the second list and am quite happy to be here.

Tell me more about this pie shake...