Plot twist-the movie ends with a crimson wave erasing everyone while Tom Cavanaugh watches with a vaguely gassy expression. 

There’s an incredibly simple explanation for Paw Patrol-the town was actually the site of the factory making the mutant ooze from Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. As a result, the fire department/public works/police/construction/etc were all turned into dogs, while the actual mayor (Ryder) became a pre-teen child and…

Can’t speak for everyone but our sperm bank used fake names instead of ID numbers ie, ‘john’ or ‘michael’ instead of ‘146839265’. They told us when our kid is a teenager we should give them the profile code name, so if they ever run into another donor-conceived kid they can figure out relatively quickly if they’re…

It’s super old fashioned...my grandma was 90 when she was using it, so I give her a pass, but I think under 50-60 is where referring to female friends as “girlfriend” feels really dated. 

I have a super dumb question, and it wouldn’t have really impacted the films but it seems like an obvious solution: Since J-Law was clearly checked out, couldn’t they have had her appear as Mystique and then immediately handwave a reason why she had to look like someone else for the rest of the goddamn movies? 

FWIW I’m a lesbian and I’ve always hated referring to someone as a “partner”. Felt too much like a law firm. I have zero issue with girlfriend, I called my ex-wife my wife when we were married, and I think people should do whatever they want...but for me, partner just feels impersonal.

Agreed. I was making a to-do list today, and I was trying to explain to someone I have to do it on my phone because my handwriting is so bad I won’t know what I wrote, defeating the whole purpose of the to-do list...

Seagulls are assholes.

It’s less don’t ask questions, and more “Hey, this is way outside my wheelhouse. Is there an appropriate time for me to ask some questions? I don’t mean to pry, but I want to learn.”

As a corollary: I think more kids should be taught the idea that families come in different types. My son is 5, and he gets very upset (understandably) when someone asks him about his “dad”, or if someone asks if I am his stepmom because they already met his other mom. It’s compounded by being the child of divorced…

See and I still think the ghost sex paled in comparison to when one man with a non-automatic weapon somehow held an entire hospital hostage long enough to endanger or shoot every lead on the show. 

I can’t believe you made it through the whole review without once saying “YOU’RE A WANKER, NUMBER 9!”

My brother in a chicken restaurant at the age of 6, while dancing trying to hold it in: “Mooooooom, am I a hen or a rooster?”

My son LOVES my mom’s cooking. Literally, everything she’s ever made him he gobbles up. Except the time she served turkey bacon.

Also, I legit can’t remember, but didn’t they just cheat for the older daughter? If the younger one is graduating, she’s the one they didn’t cheat for, so...good for her for not being perceived as dumb as her sister? I feel bad for the younger one, since she’s going to be seen as caught up in this even though she…

On Call the Doctor, there are three songs that flash me back to feeling like this lost lonely kid in high school, and hearing those songs made me realize there was a whole world of awesome outside of the assholes in my school:

I have an insane soft spot for Call the Doctor, because it spoke to me on a deep level when I was a teenager trying to figure out who I was as I was coming out.

I am deeply disappointed this was not a comforter emblazoned with Sarah Michelle Gellar holding a stake. 

I am deeply disappointed this was not a comforter emblazoned with Sarah Michelle Gellar holding a stake. 

Exactly. IIRC isn’t that Tim Kaine’s view? He personally wouldn’t support it, but he would never tell anyone else they have to take his stance?

Also, and this is me being nitpicky, but Ned was basically coasting off the theory that Robert would always have dark-haired children. Allegedly, though, wasn’t his grandmother or great grandmother a Targaryean? Genetics is weird, and it would be 100% possible for him to have blond babies with Cersei.