Seattle has a summertime festival which includes two weeks of neighborhood parades and events. One of the first is the Green Lake milk carton derby. That year, there were MULTIPLE “Mercer Island Bridge” entries. They all sank. On purpose? It’s hard to tell since a very high percentage do, every year.

They’re doing it to us too. I’ve already preemptively given my notice for the day it goes into effect.

Our new “next gen workspace” will have no offices, no cubes, no assigned space whatsoever. Just tables and cubbies and couches and blah blah blah. Every day we arrive and open our locker to retrieve whatever and drop off whatever, go find a space to sit (hoping you don’t end up between Corn Nut Eater and Flatulence…

One year some relatives from Kansas were visiting my family in the burbs outside Seattle, the year of the Turkey Day Storm, in their big ass RV. Power went out about an hour into the cooking of the turkey. The turkey, and the rest of the meal, were cooked in the RV kitchen or over a fire in a 50 gallon drum on the…

A client of a law firm I worked for in the 80s had to pay a judgment. He made out a check on some boxers, and submitted it with the memo line: taking it in the shorts again. This was a real thing that I personally saw, and it was accepted by the bank.

Definitely not to me, but if it were, say, $150? Which is what $10M is probably like to him? Eh.

I still look for Martha Stewart Slab Pies at Costco everytime I go there, even though it’s been 6-7 years since they existed. I would pay a very pretty penny for one of the chicken pot [slab] pies. How could you tease us so, Martha, with the food of the gods, and then take it away forever?

I went back to college late, so my group projects (business school) took place when I was pushing thirty and the rest of the group were 20 year olds. I worked full time and really had limited time for screwing around, and I could not be on campus frequently during 9-5, so when I was it infuriated me when we got…

“The Dementia Years”.

Manx kitties are the best.

Can I just say, how weird it is that Norm MacDonald is doing commercials for KFC? “The last dangerous” comic on SNL (per Tina Fey). Shilling for shitty chicken in hokey ads?

I actually had my cat’s genetic material banked 14 years ago for such an eventuality. I was really attached to that cat (I’d had her for 20+ years and she was the smartest animal I’ve ever known) and knowing I was maybe, someday, going to be able to go forward with it made me feel a tiny bit better at the time. I just…

I sincerely believe that backlash again Proposition 8, funded to the tune of $22M by the Mormon Church, is what led to the Obergefell decision. We would have got there eventually, but Prop 8 lit the gas.

Given the pace of injuries this year, Jake Locker was very wise to retire. He’d have been dead by now.

Rogue Dead Guy. Bummed about the new ‘hood — no trick or treaters. I’m all the way at the bottom of the hill by the busy road, and my stupid porch light is motion-activated only, which I assume means no one wants to come down to the dark house on the off chance. I was PREPARED with lots of candy and halloween colored…

A former male co-worker was proposed to by his girlfriend. I don’t remember all the details, but she somehow found something to associate with each word of “will you marry me” and presented them to him as gifts. “Will” was a puppy named Will!

And these guys.

I will teach everyone to play pinochle.

I hate everyone. Except the beer guy at the rat-themed park.

I just can’t get past how very, very much this kitten needs to come live at my house.