I think it’s closer to “Lady Bountiful”.

Shut your mouth re pickled herring, the food of the gods!

My brother taught driver’s ed in the 70’s. He had as students a couple of brothers that had recently immigrated as refugees from China or Vietnam — anyway someplace where they hadn’t had an opportunity to ever drive a car or even really to ride in one. They also spoke very poor English. They were named Ernest and…

The best I could do was to keep a written log of every transaction personally, but if I forgot something or made a math error, I was screwed.

If the Mustang wanted to exit, he probably shouldn’t have been in the furthest-left lane (but for the HOV) when it was coming up so quickly. He was assuming he could get around the slower truck to his right, ahead of everyone, and get all the way over and exit — a maneuver every one of us has performed (well, I have).…

Dude, Paul was RIGHT THERE.

That’s like the time in Oregon, when the guy at the gas station informed me I couldn’t pump my own gas. I probably rolled my eyes, and he lectured me about the danger of gas pump hoses going wild! Spraying gas everywhere in a very dangerous fashion! Which clearly happens on a daily basis in the other states.

It’s part of a larger problem, people not being able to see past their own assholes. At my company there are a few charger stations in the multi-story garage, well-marked and managed. There are also parking spots close by electrical outlets that some electric cars connect to, NOT marked. But anyone with eyes can see…

I don’t know what it is, but it’s DEFINITELY going to be on the table come Halloween. Trapped olive-eyeballs and disembodied tomato-lips and all.

I like a whole poached egg, or fried egg, but if I’m eating an omelette or scramble, I don’t like the taste of the yolk in there. It’s like — yolk good, white good — but yolk mixed with white bad. Weird, I know.

I want “munch” to be in this list.

Oh, got it! That makes better sense. Might have been very delicious but not to the guy’s taste. He knew you were the bride, right?

My former neighbor’s dog ate (1) an entire loaf of bread, (2) a pound of butter including the paper wrapping, and (3) most of a tray of potu, before she was caught. The subsequent gastric disturbance was spectacular.

Please elaborate? Serious question — are they not necessarily supposed to taste good, in favor of their appearance? This is something I did not know! I would be very disappointed if I got undelicious cake at a wedding.

How did this guy get elected? Right after Pope Palpatine? I’m sure it is DEEPLY uncomfortable for people like Timothy Dolan, being forced to deal with the wide gap between their SOP and Cool Pope’s statements. Cool Pope is still a Catholic, of course, and has made many pronouncements I disagree with strongly, but it’s…

This might be useful information. A couple of weeks ago my asshole gardeners (I rent, I didn’t hire them) filled the yard waste bin so full with wet, heavy yard waste, Waste Management refused to take it — they left a notice on it that it was “overweight” and “contaminated”. I couldn’t budge the thing, even to get it…

I have my mom’s wedding ring (married in the 1930s), which is basically diamond chips in a pave-type setting, and my grandmother’s (probably married in the 19teens), which is a plain but substantial gold band, with my grandparents’ initials engraved inside. If I personally were going to wear one, I’d want a plain…

An argument could be made that anyone who worked in any capacity that supported the German government during those years was supporting murder. From the “Nazi marathons” I’ve had on in the background on various channels on weekends, it seems that the decision was made at the end of the war to prosecute the…

A guy at work was doing this bit where he maintained every question could be answered by, “bend over and I’ll show you”. Minor laughs. “What’s wrong with this copier? Bend over and I’ll show you.”