Will Herr Trump make us all get fake orange spray tans?! I would look terrible in fake orange spray tan. It will clash with my fake red hair in the Pussy Internmet Camp!

since he cant sell burgers at his restaurant and can’t sell his steaks at sharper image, he has to take his beef to twitter.

I know the PERFECT man for the job.

I actually lost weight when I was pregnant, in the first and second trimesters. Not really due to anything I was doing - at first I was super sick, but once that passed I just kept losing anyway. I actually insisted on seeing a dietician because I was certain I was starving my baby, but both the dietician and my dr…

I had a boss once who legit went to the doctor one afternoon and came to work the next day and announced to us that she was due to give birth in a couple weeks. Nobody had a clue, especially not her. she just looked a little overweight and she was on the pill so no reason to wonder about no periods.

Basically not.

I didn’t find out until 24 weeks, because I was on birth control that stopped my periods, and I wasn’t showing yet because it was my first pregnancy.

Have you ever watched the show? I, too, thought it would be full of stupid women or ignorant teenagers, but there are very solid reasons why women, some of whom already had children, wouldn’t know they were pregnant until they found themselves in excruciating pain during labor. Some of them were fit, active women who…

No. Some women don’t have regular periods, some women still get bleeding they believe is a period, depending on where the placenta attaches you may not even be able to feel movement at 20+ weeks, and check out some of the insanely fit women who get pregnant and look like they just a ate a big burrito at 7 months.…

I like Cooper, mainly because he’s not a DB. And he doesn’t blame anything on wind currents.

“Ted’s got cheese dribbling on to his chin, on to his shirt, on to his....where ever.”

Also:

I fixed it.

Where’s Ashley? Please tell me she’s only on vacay and her brain didn’t break from following the Donald’s every move the past year plus.

Ashley, you’re the hero we need, even if we don’t deserve you.

Would the world end if Simmons interviewed Hinkie? I’m thinking yes, but would like to hear your thoughts.

You Shitti Farty Dirty Nasty Jude Bitch!

Bugle Boy Polo Shirt isn’t a shirt for a dapper man, or a suave man, or a man who values his appearance. It’s a shirt for a man who has resigned himself to dad-dom, so much so that he goes on a nationally televised cooking program looking like a children’s mannequin from 1993 that was hit by Rich Moranis’ enlarging…