“human lasagna”

I like spinster too, but at least in my experience, being almost 40 and alone/single/a spinster/self-partnered/whatever, what people hear is exactly “I’m about to turn forty and I’m getting desperate help meeeeeee,” haha.  

Which is why I usually say I’m alone, if anyone asks. Because single always implied looking to me, and I fucking hate dating and all that so, nope, I’m alone. And not looking. It’s just me. And happy about it.

You can like paint on a horse.

The teen girl’s mother has also been told by other parents that her daughters need to cover up for “the sake of their sons.”

euphemisms like ‘the marital hug’

This made me LOL over just how gross a combo that is. I’m impressed!

Jager. Ugh.

has been shamed by several gynos

Who...does this? 

“It’s a distress call,’’ he said. “It’s to get attention so I can tell people what’s going on and that someone is hacking me.”

That face!

I know someone with a Lasagna. I love it.

My stepmom calls my cat Stink, which I think is cute. (Her name’s not really Stink, and she does not smell bad, so I dunno.)

In front of rows of boxes labeled “Kavanaugh files,” Republicans on the Senate Judiciary Committee argued that the documents they were providing were enough to fairly evaluate Kavanaugh. “These are 167 boxes. Each box would hold approximately 6,000 pages,” Senator Thom Tillis of North Carolina said.

Move 2,300 miles away.

“Tennessee Monument to Unborn Children, In Memory of the Victims of Abortion: Babies, Women, and Men.”

Yup. I once had a guy’s hand on my ass almost the entire way to my stop on a very crowded subway train. As soon as the doors opened, I sprinted off the train and looked around for the guy but didn’t see him. Relieved, I went up the stairs to exit the station and he appeared right next to me. He then asked me out in…

Or women. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Well, shit. That’s my birthday too.