Yeah, you’re not all for people making their own choices at all, friend.

I have a china cabinet literally brimming with vintage gravy boats because my grandma is insane and won’t stop buying me dishes. I have approximately ten gravy boats. Can I be your date if I bring the present? You can pick which boat to re-gift. Maybe several.

Former general Michael Flynn?

Also let’s not forget that when he says “many people don’t know,” he actually means, “I just found this out either yesterday or literally as I was walking out onto the stage”.

yesterday i was thinking about how frogs can get boiled to death without really noticing that it’s happening; and then i was thinking man aren’t frogs lucky thats kind of a sweet deal.

When Trump announced the ban, he said he’d made the decision “in consultation with my Generals,” an assertion which now begs the question: And which generals might those be?

prior to Kim Jong Un using it

Pickled okra is delicious. As is the dried okra from Trader Joe’s that I dip in my horseradish hummus. Never appreciated okra until I moved to the South.

Fry it and it’s even better.

Yeah, beet it.

Probably not a fan of spicey (peppers).

Lets just hope they haven’t lettuce down the wrong path.

And the corn has ears!

Potatoes have eyes everywhere!

And the corn has ears!

Melania Trump planted kale in Michelle Obama’s garden today, which I guess is better than the alternative but like, I don’t know, please step off our leeks!!!!

As the child of narcissist, he gives me panic attacks.

Narcissist.

He then went to the Red Cross shelter, barged to the front of the food line and demanded two scoops of ice cream to eat in front of crying children.

You lucky bastards.