Shoutout to all the kids who answered “present” when a substitute teacher paused during roll call.

I’m a frequent flyer, who almost exclusively flies United.

I’d LOVE to say no to funeral invitations. There’s not a single one I’d like to attend - not even my parents. I guess funerals serve a purpose for other people, but I find them pointless. But of course, I’m gonna be the asshole if I don’t go.

Sorry, but this is sort of BS. We did this to pay some emergency expenses off. Our credit score stayed about the same. The big hit came when Progressive motorcycle insurance reviewed our credit. They hit us with a $150 increase (25% bump on the premium) as we opened a credit card account too recently and it added…

30% utilization really is the magic number. I accidentally went just over 30% due to a large purchase, and my credit score dropped over 100 points. Utilization is definitely something that you want to keep a close eye on.

ESPN fell into the same trap that other news companies have:

Nice try, but there’s plenty of dicks in video games.

Video game sex scenes, regardless of the amount of work it takes to make them or the amount of “importance” it has to the story or character development, will always be an excuse to shoehorn in polygonal tits. Call me when games start swinging dong.

This article just proves the problem with society. You write the half truth and uneducated people take it as the full truth. I paid capital gains tax on my investments so that must mean that I am paying a“ lower rate on that than you are, even though you fucking work for your money.” The problem with this is that I…

It could fund the entire budget of the State Department and the Labor Department, and still have enough left over to purchase every NFL team except the Jaguars and shut them down, so the Jaguars would win the Super Bowl, by default.

Fuck you, shithead. Get a job and stop trying to leech onto others, U commie bitch!

Uuhhhhhhhhhhhhhh she (Kara Brown) isn’t white. But nice try.

I’ve always believed the incessant push to get everyone to attend college only oversaturates the market and devalues all degrees. College these days really isn’t what it used to be decades ago.

Can confirm. First thing I noticed about the shower in the apartment me and mrs. mcdonut are moving to is that there is no obvious place to put the drink in this new shower.

Flat wages plus higher prices as a result of regulatory costs and monetary policy. The private passenger automobile will be a rich man’s toy again once the cheap credit is no longer able to compensate for both.

I don’t think anyone buying these behemoths are all that concerned about fuel economy.

No one should shame or stigmatize Charlie Sheen for being HIV positive. They should shame and stigmatize him for being a woman beater (and shooter) and a piece of garbage.

I heard Yelp was trying to sue Southpark over that (apparently not seeing the delicious irony), which I found hilarious. I don’t remember where I heard it, though.

Finger-lickin’good takes on a whole new meaning.