Yeah, that is one of the more unbelievably fucked up parts.

NCAA reinstated wins.

Ever dated a Steelers fan?

The program should have gotten the death penalty.

He’s eligible to play this week, right?

I’ll say he was good

Did someone call in and say “a giant black man fired a gun”? In that case, he would fit a description. If not, and he was tackled because he was a giant black man running from a dangerous scene, then he fits something else, and we have a problem.

Fit the description of what? The police didn’t even know what happened.

I’m cool with any cop with their body camera turned off for no reason being guilty until proven innocent. If they can turn them off and have zero repercussions when doing so then what’s the point of them?

Like they borrowed a plane to go see it better? Or looked at it from a government building? My client’s office gave out adorable department themed sun shields and let everyone go on the roof to watch it.

Buried the lede. She and Munchbutt are being investigated for using government property to go watch the eclipse.

And they can’t even master the glocks they’re given. It’s a clusterfuck.

Yup. They’re offended by players silently kneeling during the anthem, calling it disrespectful.

“I’m going to burn this flag to show how awful those anti-American bastards are. That way they won’t be able to disrespect its glory!” said the dumbest sumbitch around.

I am in the military. Trained soldiers have a tough enough time mastering the use of this equipment. There is no need for the police to have this stuff, cops aren’t supposed to be soldiers.

That’s brilliant. I’m pleasantly shocked Mad magazine is skewering American Hitler and his flunky sidekick, Attorney General Keebler, that thoroughly. I’ll write it again: brilliant.

On the plus side, Juan stranded three base runners.

They won’t be able to answer that question until Trump pardons either Jerry Sandusky or Jared Fogle, the finalists for their new PR spokesman.

Aaron Hernandez’s sentence ends... oh wait, nevermind.