I would have felt better about the future of our country if he had struggled through “Hippos Go Berserk” instead of the “Xenophobia Playbook”.

I’m enjoying seeing the ageism pour out from the writers as if they themselves are going to remain 29 forever. Knowing that no matter how rigid their purity tests become, shitty joints, heartburn from everything, and bushy ear hair await them all is really fun.

Beyond a quick personal inventory of what has you annoyed in that moment, I refuse to believe anyone at Splinter does any research before writing their latest screed.

Kevin Hart is a terrible crime scene investigator and Ellen is sloppy about labeling evidence. 

Oh you should have seen the giant nonsense response from them that I dismissed.

“Why didn’t the child forced into sex work make the clearest, most rational decision?”

Just paying for sex, no big deal. That it was with a child being forced into the job doesn’t really seem to matter to them.

If it doesn’t hurt the least among us, it’s not a GOP policy. 

Other than to derail everything and make everyone talk about your particular kinks, what was the point of your nonsense?  

I don't know how long you'll get to remain out of the greys, but this is delightful. 

Is it possible Hamilton is supposed to be putting out articles under the Onion's banner but keeps sending them to Splinter by mistake?

Sounds like it’s the perfect time for Kahlua.

*You're

I will be nice when doxxing is punished like the real crime that it is.  

I’m a mediocre white male with the ability to use a semi-colon correctly 3/4 of the time. Why do I not have the undeserved, yet seemingly boundless, confidence of Steven A. Redacted?

Bug-eyed would be the best way to describe my expression while reading the editors notes. Crazy random editor kept criticizing things while misspelling his own stuff.  The multiple references to ebonics were out of left field, even for a giant pile of crazy like this.  

I wish he'd stop being so emotional.  

Kirstjen Nielsen seemed a lot less dangerous when she was just lying on behalf of the Sweetums corporation.  

I just learned a new thing existed.  

“It still puts the onus on the people who don’t want to hug to say they don’t want a hug. The more non-confrontational and compliant they are, the more difficult it is to say no. So in essence, yes, by asking, you’re being manipulative.”