No matter what people's names are, I never remember them anyway unless I make a joke out of them. To their face. When I meet them. If I don't do that it takes me ages to learn their name, and if I do, they never want to talk to me again.

That's really funny! I want a "Shit American Expats Say In ......" and a "Shit UK Expats Say In....." and a "Shit Australian Expats Say in London" and a "Shit English Expats Say In New Zealand" series -es. I mean it!

It's not that you're gay, but you're being such a bitch!

One of the nicest compliments I ( a straight person who avoids asking people about their sexuality) ever received was from a workmate who said, "I know you're cool because of the way you avoid using gendered pronouns."

Your value as a woman in Iran seems to equal your value as part of the martyr breeding part of the proud and martyrs breeding nation of Iran .

Does the existence of Lamb Fries mean that in Minnesota they dock their lambs? Because that is excellent animal husbandry.

Isn't this that book by Nabakov?

It's time to bring back the hoop skirt!

I do have a lovely big house in the country though, and a townhouse in London with a BIG attic. There used to be strange apple tree growing outside...

I thought not indicating your status WAS that option...

so that Facebook knows

Jesus Christ on a bike, you're right

I'm sorry for LOLing, but that's a beautiful happy ending right there.

Well ain't that EVERYbody's dream?

You win a million billion dollars for that literary reference. Sorry, I don't have it, but if I did, you'd win it. Now I'm off to read The Magician's Nephew again.

He DOES seem like an asshole. But now I have to read about the 10 actors who actually killed people and the 10 actors who died on set....

If I was a teacher I'd probably say it to at least one class a semester.

So, what was she teaching? The Diary of Anne Frank? Slaughterhouse Five? All Quiet On The Western Front? Something about the death of the Romanov family?