Becomes first NBA athlete killed by a rabid Philly fan’s RPC (Rocket Propelled Cheesesteak)

“Each of these recruits needs to have an equal number of escorts”

There’s a reason Arizona was the last state to pass MLK Day (I assume these were the Suns’ local guys, although THEY SHOULD GIVE HIM A TECHNICAL guy sounds like a pumped-up Doug Collins).

The top NBA draftees per draft slot by win shares (according to ESPN)

I still have my Vernon Maxwell jersey (purchased for $5 at a College Station sporting goods store after he was traded for Drexler). I also have the ugly bluish late 90s one (Kevin Willis[!]), the white and red years (McGrady), and the red-and-yellow quasi-return to form (Carl Landry[!!])

Remember the Texas GOP long con: pass obviously unconstitutional and cruel laws to satisfy idiot base, enrich and give reactionary prestige to buddy outside consultant law firms in half-heartedly defending the doomed legislation, but in the interim screw over ‘the other.’ Truly breathtaking assholery, made mundane by…

I hope to God this devolves to Rick having his own cable access show in Louisville protesting his innocence with luminary guests, all the while people telling him to just shut the fuck up, like Ace Rothstein (Frank Rosenthal) wound up doing in Casino.

I thought A League of Their Own crossed with Motley Crue would be Vixen (featured in The Decline of Western Civilization II: The Metal Years)

It literally subverted my male gaze and I ran into a utility pole this morning.

“Closer examination of Schill indicated that he was in fact a sock-puppet with two buttons for eyes operated by Phil Knight. Representatives of Nike Pre-Teen Leatherworkers International, LLC vigorously deny the allegations.”

Even more than National Lampoon’s European Vacation? Don’t forget to adjust for mid-80s dollars!

To be fair you were a pretty together guy until you put your head through that phased-matter wall and glimpsed the 9th Dimension.

At least everyone in the United Center will at last be united in the feeling that they’ve been cheated.

But seriously, who loves ruining NBA franchises?

I would have yelled YOU’RE NO BLUESHAMMER then tried to buy Charlotte a drink only to learn that I’m not down with paying $45 for two whiskey shots.

If only she had been warned of his poor decision-making beforehand

The dude to be afraid of on the Rockets was backup center Charles Jones, who actually lead the league for several consecutive seasons in fatal decapitations via elbow. He was about 73 at the time of this video but earlier in the season had elbowed Danny Schayes’ head into the 9th row (it was surgically re-attached…

If we were really going unwritten rules Rudy Tomjanovich ironically pulls a Kermit Washington on Ainge’s face in the post-game handshake line.

I know of at least three GM’s cars that will be getting kicked in a drunken rage, which is a shame, because Magic probably has a real nice car.

What if the car’s been vandalized because it used to belong to a college basketball player’s ex-girlfriend? Where’s that CGI fox wearing a T-shirt?