Man, I wrote an email about being told by my doctor that I wouldn’t be able to breastfeed on my medication and how I feel like a failure and a bad mother and I’m not even pregnant yet. I looked at mommy blogs and they were telling women to get second opinions and not believe the doctors and that nurses still pushed…

Making up grandiose stories is usually a symptom of an underlying mental disorder (speaking as someone with bipolar disorder and a whole family of people with mental disorders). As an extreme example, when my grandfather had manic episodes he used to think the car was flying. My father would think he would be a…

I have nothing to say about this video. I am ridiculously excited for the new Taylor Swift single that is coming out today. I hate myself.

I don’t read Goop, but I remember perusing it when it first came out. The only thing I actually liked was an old article about French pharmacy products (worth a read - good, inexpensive shit in there) and those articles that followed GP around when she went to award shows and stuff (because I am hate-fascinated with…

So, I looked at the partial eclipse with my naked eyes today (shut up about it mom!). Then I looked through my phone camera (pointed directly at the sun) thinking it was safer...waiting for the blindness to kick in.

I so fucking wish I wrote this masterpiece. I wonder if it has a Wikipedia page?

It is most definitely real. I do not know about signed copies though.

Mr. PrincessMonsterTruck and I already have a name picked out if we have a boy: Axl Rosenberg. He will be the coolest kid in Hebrew school.

My coffee table book is “How to Talk To Your Cat About Gun Safety” and it cost less than $10 on Amazon. I think my book is better.

I went to a Patriots super bowl parade in Boston once in high school and people threw bottles of urine then. Boston basically smells like pee. Dont go near Fenway after a Sox game (or get on the T then - hearing drunks bros sing Sweet Caroline gets old real fast. I fucking hate that song). I used to live right on the…

I live in Boston and I practice immigration law. I would say that racism in Boston is subtle, not as out in the open as in the south. We have the best hospitals and universities (humble brag) so there is an enormous international community for not being a very big city (Example: about 80% of the researchers at MGH are…

But If you could photobomb the picture with the Trump Chicken you could at least get a chuckle from it. Although if your’re a woman I don’t be afraid of him grabbing my pussy.

The only way visiting Trump’s White House would be worth it is if you could be a super-spy and get into his living quarters and release a swarm of super wasps in the bathroom to sting his dick the next time he takes a piss.

Do not insult cats by placing them near Trump. He does not deserve their beauty and majesty.

At least they’re faux fur???

I had to recently teach my mom that using the word oriental was offensive. She had no clue. Then she touched a black woman’s hair (she was three martinis deep at the time, but still no excuse) and I had to explain that you don’t do that because it is weird and rude. Some old people need a refresher course on things…

We may not even make it to 2020. I’m sliding further and further away from reading the news so I’ll just be waiting until Nazis come for my Jewish ass or we all blow up in a nuclear explosion. At least I’ll be more or less happy until that point in time.

I just deleted Facebook (and I’ve had it since it was called THE Facebook and it crashed on a regular basis because it was so new) because I couldn’t deal with the hate anymore. Best decision I’ve made all year. I comment to Jezzies only because you ladies and gentlemen are awesome (and funny as hell - I love a good…

I just deactivated my Facebook account (I’ve had it since it was called THE Facebook, so it’s a big deal) because I couldn’t handle all the crazy alt-right Trump supporters anymore. I’ve been driven away, probably permanently, because my faith in basic human decency and rational thought is crumbling. I’ll be looking…