Prince Fluffybutt always makes fun of me by calling me a "guidette" because, I actually have no idea why. So when we saw The World's End on Friday, this was one of the previews, and he was like "look hun! It's a movie about you!" Asshat.

I like them if they're spoken word, but as an editor/writer I HATE when it's used in writing. It's just redundant and awkward.

Mine is double negatives, or negatives in front of words with positive connotations. For example:

Hmm, you sound like me and Prince Fluffybutt. We don't live together yet, but we've been together 2 years. In short, we are both very much alike and very much different, and that causes some riffs.

THAT FACE!

Oh, usually I'm the LETS GO OUT AND DO THINGS GUISE friend, but I just have my period and am running on like 4 hours of sleep per night for the last 3 days. So going out into public doesn't thrill me. And my hair is dirty, which is upsetting.

So I'm at work, and I get out at 9, and my friends are trying to go out tonight and do things. That's just not something I'm particularly interested in. I want to see the friend people, but...I want to see them in my boyfriend's house, on couches, with beer. Not out in the world. I'm exhausted, I worked today and have…

I have no tips for keeping the color, but I can tell you that deep conditioners that AREN'T meant for dyed hair will strip that color out hella quick. And try not to wash it too often, maybe every other day or more.

Wait.

Oy, I get panic attacks fairly often. I've always had them. What happens to me is I start sweating profusely, shaking, and can't breathe so I'm gasping. If they're really bad I get lightheaded and dizzy as well.

Haha, this reminds me of this one time...

OMG this happened to me, too! Right after Obamacare kicked in, I went to pick up my BC at Rite Aid and the pharmacist (a dude, I LOVE him), was like "and no co-pay!" and I got hella excited and was all "NO WAY!" and he gave me a high-five before putting me on auto-renewal so I didn't have to physically go to the store…

I always find this really odd. I live in Brooklyn, first off. More often than not, I'm carrying a big ass tote bag, so unless I have tons of shit I'm buying, I usually ask the cashier not to give me a bag since I'll just throw it in my purse (which can usually fit a small child). Also plastic bags annoy me so I don't…

It goes away on it's own, there's no medication for it. If the HPV is causing problems (such as pre-cancerous cells) then there's treatments for THAT specifically, but if the virus is just straight chillin in your system there's nothing to do about it. Your doctor will probably want to keep checking to make sure it…

I could, in theory, order coffee, but I'd have to order actual food with it because no place is going to deliver one cup of coffee. And since I already ordered food today and am leaving in an hour, that seems pointless for me to do lol

Aww thank you, but I'm in Brooklyn, NY lol

Guys. I am SO. FUCKING. TIRED.

Aw don't worry, it could be nothing.

Every once in a while, someone will tell me I look like my mom, which is insane because we look nothing alike. I mean NOTHING. Me? Pale olive skin, round dark brown eyes, dark auburn hair. Her? Fair skin, more almond shaped blue eyes, blonde hair. HOW DOES THAT LOOK ALIKE?

It took almost 2 years for me and Prince Fluffybutt to poop in front of each other. We're pretty gross human beings, and we've seen/heard each other piss, puke (mostly me puke), cry, fart, burp, etc but always managed to be alone while pooping. Until recently. We just stopped giving a fuck.