Wait ... but they already have this stuff??

Whaaaa? Do you rinse? Did it take time for your hair to settle down? When I don’t shampoo, my scalp gets itchy and flaky.

Lots of reasons. I’ll quote Contact: “There are a thousand reasons we can think of for you to have this, but mostly it’s for the reasons we can’t think of.”

With her! With her! Not at.

Seriously! His comments are really upsetting me. I was on the fence about seeing the movie and now thanks to this asshole I definitely won’t be.

I’ve been a Jezebel reader for over 7 years and I have never been ungreyed! I understand that back in the Gawker days they only ungreyed people they thought were particularly witty — but Jezebel, I’d say, has moved beyond that. I don’t think the original thinking applies anymore.

Witty comments are nice, but as jinni…

Can you tell me the name of the new perfume?

Thank God he wasn’t, or else the world would have been deprived of the awesomeness that is Chris Evans.

Mermoa!

I’m under the impression that John Cusack is a dick, too. (I live in Chicago)

I’d add Fifth Element to this list. I will never not watch it. Periodically I will even watch it on purpose.

Are you ... are you KIDDING ME?! Catholics have some of the best style out there. Leaving aside centuries of elaborate embroidery and huge cathedrals with stained glass windows, let me introduce: all of the insanely Catholic imagery from 1996's Romeo + Juliet.

No he’s not. He’s a charismatic black hole. The movie skidded to a halt every time he was onscreen.

Seriously! I mean holy shit your comment brought all the rats out of the basement

HAAA shit I totally thought that was Gwendoline Christie. I’d much rather get a call from her.

(Might not fit here but it came to mind as all women are beautiful, just take race out of it as though you couldn’t see it.)

Are you near a beach? Could you possibly try barefoot sand running as a test?

How the hell are Gattaca, Sunshine, and Ex Machina not on the list and Under the Skin is? Actually even 28 Days Later qualifies as science fiction. Also, Mad Max: Fury Road should be lower on the list. I love that movie, but there’s honestly not much to it; the entire movie is a car chase with some rather blatant…

I’m far from the first person to defend the Kardashians, but Kim doesn’t even drink, and I doubt she does drugs. I think the worst those kids will have to deal with is their father’s massive ego.

Unfortunately, having your superiors tell you to “ignore him” is the rule, not the exception.