Your tombstone is under further review. Hopefully it will be finished before you are done being dead.

Still not the worst beating suffered by a Ventura on the mound.

Is it just me but in the middle panel does the mythical animal being reborn in fire look less like a majestically rising bird and more like a lounging possum?

Man takes action to directly draw attention to himself.
Man complains about all the attention he’s getting.
Man is insufferable.

Not to be outdone, Rob Gronkowski tweeted a picture of himself partying on a riverboat cruise through the flooded area.

Goose’s loose deuce.

“Let slip the turds of war,” he yelled out with blood curdling fervor and then shat himself verily.

I liked baseball better when the game was played by specialists, not a bunch of showboat do-it-all “athletes.” Someone once showed Goose Gossage a photograph of a basketball and he loosed his bowels and fell into a coma for three months.

The whole point of golf is to play less golf.

Joe GIRARDI, the guy mentioned in the article above, is the manager of the Yankees.

Uhh... Torre hasn’t managed the Yankees since 2007

Don’t you have some Two and Half Men fan fic you should be working on? You shouldn’t be using all your good material on deadspin.

I can't go for that.

+1 privates eyed

Hall & Scrote

I’ve always wondered what John Oates would look like if he worked out more.

Madison Bumgarner’s facial expression 99% of the time.

When Bennett runs the wrong route and Brady’s pass gets intercepted, will it still be Cutler’s fault?

Fatherboy

+1 Balboa Bay Window