When I was eight I read a Star Wars story that featured a green rabbit who walked on two legs and carried a blaster. Taught me not to give a shit about canon. My life is better for it.

Boom. I almost wonder if they do these things to drive engagement.

Dude I want your elbow.

I hate that I laughed.

You seriously need to be on government watchlist when you buy a fucking Charger at this point, I swear to god in heaven. You can talk shit about any other car’s owners all you want, but there is no group of people on the planet as completely brain-dead knuckle-dragging stupid as Charger people.

You think they’re going to Charger for improperly storing a dangerous fuel in her vehicle?

“If propane or any other fuel isn’t stored in a well-ventilated area, it can’t be a recipe for disaster.”

The obvious answer is a BMW 850i, a Maserati Quattroporte, or any heavily depreciated Mercedes with a V12. Cars that people will obviously be cross-shopping with the Nissan Versa.

Now the man that invented the robot
Thought he was mighty fine
But John Henry made fifteen bowls
The steam drill only made nine, Lord, Lord
The robot only made nine

Where to start on Wack-Packers that I miss . . .

The truth hurts. Amazing.

And we are entertained! “What car” is my favorite Jalop feature; I look forward to it each week.

Fly me with balloons...

Because it’s an Audi...and he knows what’s coming.

He was club fucking footed ya asswipe.

I fly literally all the time, and of course eat in restaurants ALL the time when I am travelling for work. I don’t find (sit-down) airport restaurants to be notably more expensive than the equivalent restaurant elsewhere in a given area. But I don’t buy booze in restaurants (I can’t expense booze, and for me it’s free…

There is no more torturous first-world problem that getting stuck in a Starbucks drive-thru line for a half-hour if just one car ahead of you is a soccer mom in a Suburban filled with teens, each wanting their own, customized Frappuccino.

Because if the entry was “I have this 2017 Audi and I’m gonna keep it, just wanted to let you know!” We wouldn’t have a WCSYB column...this is for entertainment purposes. 

These are all very good points. I have a fully paid off 9 year old X5 diesel with 136K miles on the clock and don’t bat an eye on consumables or preventative maintenance repairs that are essential once most cars hit 6-figure mileage. I just spent over a grand replacing LCAs and bushings which might seem crazy for a…

I hope they stop at speed though. Once they’re on meth, orders may start getting weird and confusing again.