Run, baby. You run now.

Don’t. Go shopping!

Honestly, all of this new shit is upper middle class bullshit. My family is working class to poor, and they do none of this pinterest bullshit. It weirds me the fuck out to see other women do it.

You know, I’m totally OK with judging someone who lets her toddlers drink leftover party alcohol because she’s too hungover herself to deal. And I have no kids and none on the way. I get that motherhood is hard, but is it THAT hard to get your ass up to keep your children from getting poisoned?

I love her and Judy Greer. Could someone get something going where these two are leading ladies in a well-done romantic comedy? Hollywood, do I have to tell you how to do everything?!

Trivago looks dingy, like in dire need of exfoliation. And he reeks of tobacco. I can’t believe he was cast for those spots.

this movie looks questionable but why isn’t kathryn hahn in everything? always? all the time?

The Trivago guy is a monster. I’m waiting for a Sham Wow size scandal to emerge with him in the center. I feel it in my soul.

Is it safe to admit I watched JS?

This is the most epic case of accidental shade I’ve ever seen.

Yeah, that one was a little surprising but also not.

Homeboy is a clear winter complexion who thinks he's a deep autumn. So sad.

this baby nero looks like he’d slit my throat to use my blood as rouge. no.

disagree

To birth one asshole may be regarded as a misfortune (see Chet Haze and Tom Hanks); to birth two looks like bad parenting.

I scrolled through his IG and I legit cannot imagine being him and having his upbringing. Like, it’s true luxury. Even in my wildest dreams, I couldn’t touch it.

A story about Peter and Harry Brant from the comments of a 2012 Jezebel story about Peter (http://jezebel.com/i-once-sat-in-…), which I immediately thought of because the amount of utterly clueless privilege is just painful:

From that photo, I’m guessing that “sweating profusely and pale in color” is de rigueur for Young Master Brant.