I like to call it “Lost Wages”...

[plaintively] Shut up, tomato...

“...a statue erected before his death at Forbes Field...”

And now it’s 10-0...

“Now 7% hate free!”

That’s the one where Chris Farley has to save his family’s auto parts company, right?

And then bought a giant, purple suit with it...

Meatwad.

Is this based on Avery’s own release from prison after killing a woman while driving drunk?

Yeah, but other than the four stories noted above, what has Deadspin written about this story in the past 24 hours?!?!

Shut up, potato!

Look to your left. Look to your right. One of the people you just looked at will end up being the New York Times’ streaking correspondent...

That is legitimately odd...

Stow that shit, sailor! Your hot take just singed my eye brows!

Henry Wallace...

He found them in the toilet after a visit from Henry Kissinger...

FOOL! HE WAS BITTEN BY A RADIOACTIVE VAGINAL EGG!!!

Jill Laimbeer...

I think I saw you ordering donuts the other day while blood slowly trickled out of your left ear...

Time to kill Grisham. Got it.