I’ll lick the spoon of my homemade cookie dough, but not yours. Certainly not any cookie dough abortion that comes from the store.

Chipolte considers anything with 350 miles “locally sourced” product. Locally sourced, organic, farm-fresh, and all the other buzz words are empty and mean nothing. I’d prefer a major producer whose been in business for many years over Jim and Jane local “farmer” whose food standards may not be what would be rejected…

Texas resident speaking: I don’t know a single person who cared about the people Blue Bell killed. They just pined for the stuff to come back like it was the second coming of Christ.

Blue Bell continued making ice cream after they knew there was problems. Chipotle continued to use “locally sourced” products after many, many problems.

“Every tongue that rises up against me in judgement shall be condemned.”

You mean all the murder of men, women, and children once approved by Jehovah is now not approved by Jehovah?

Lot: “ I swear I tripped and it just fell into my daughter’s vagina. Right Lord?”

When three wars aren’t enough, call on Ratman and Bombin to start another.

Here’s what slays me about that passage... They MADE their father drink the wine. Because, of course, he wouldn’t have done it otherwise. But they somehow knew if they got their father to drink it, he would get so rip-roarin’ drunk that he wouldn’t remember what happened that night. And would be down for some…

. . .when I got married, I vowed to God first and then to Joshua for better or for worse, till death do we part,”

Wanted: Gullible people who believe in superficial appearances and style over substance, materialism and consumerism over personal values, and a public lie over personal truth.

Old joke worth repeating.

Also I had a great scrambled chicken this morning with a side of bacon. Yummy!

Use the money to buy the needed medicines from the other manufacturer and distribute for free through charitable organizations.

Fuck that. If he donates the money, keep it. Use it for something worthwhile, but don’t give that shit back.

Taking bets on Shkreli dead pool. Suicide or homicide within two years.

Time to put this one down.

When I was five I believed in God, Jesus, and the Holy Flying Spook. When I was eight I learned about science, history, and mythology. Goodbye deities—hello doubt and wonder!

Didn’t know she was once a man named Antonio “Testtickles” Carmine when she was “cut” for skimming from running numbers. Juicy Joe was formally Wendy Wetness before transitioning into a goomba.