When I was wee bee-eater, my fam was in San Diego to ogle the trapped animals. One night, we went to an Outback. The guy there was AMAZING. Called my dad "boss", memorized our orders, and went above and beyond for my sister and I, who were fanatically picky eaters. My dad stops him in front of the manager and handed…

Dave Barry once wrote "someone who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person."

The only dating advice my mother ever gave me was "Never date a man who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter." It has served me well.

midwesterners at every table like it was an all you can eat buffet at Denny's.

I wish there was another day for submissions because I have a DOOZY from yesterday.

This is not exlusive to the Midwest, either - I think just more rural areas. We took my dad and his wife to Korean BBQ to try something new when they were visiting recently, and we thought it was very reasonably priced at about $25 per person. They insisted on paying even though I kept trying to steal the check…

I am midwest, born and raised. And I found this story (and the writer's descriptions) hilarious.

As an atheist in the Midwest, it really gets old being in the service industry and being pummeled with Christianity on the clock. Whatever I'm being paid, it's never enough to deal with the "you need to be saved" pamphlets and speeches. And don't even get me started on the post church groups who file into their local…

He turns to his bright-eyed eight year old, sitting but two feet from me, and says, "You see son? This is why you should stay in school."(FFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU)

You can stop now, Midwestern Christians are not an oppressed group.

I worked at a coffee shop in Arkansas once and we served two very complicated items. One- salted caramel latte' two- a Chipotle BLT sandwich.

The newly minted summer crop of young white house staffers. Hands down, the most insufferable group of turds I've ever waited on as a cocktail waitress waiting tables near Union Station in DC. They'd roll in every summer and run our staff ragged, not tip, and often snicker at us as we turned our backs to their tables…