I'm going to write "poop". Tee-hee!

Why not distill your upvotes into a fine liquid spirit while there's still time?

"Boyle, Raheem, and Tony"

Aww. It was an email prank. For a second I thought that Roger Allam might have taken on his greatest acting challenge yet, and come away from it triumphant.

It was still totally ineffective against men in tights and powdered wigs (with sophisticated naval armaments), so don't gush too much.

Can you really train to be a samurai? I mean sure, you can learn sword-fighting, poetry, and tea ceremonies, but none of that is going to bring back a feudal, agrarian Japan.

You know what doesn't look good on the internet?: Kinja.

So you welcome World War III?

Yes, but unfortunately I have to drive up to Maine on Friday night. Otherwise I would love to hear him live.

Twin soldiers and Kinja's comin'…

The twist is that Kinja Ernie is a ghost and the comments section was dead the whole time.

Let's ask ourselves:

Joss Whedon is a feminist.
Feminism to Joss Whedon is mostly slender women beating people up.
Those two girls attempted to kill another girl because a slender man told them to.
Therefore they are feminists, therefore they are Joss Whedon, therefore Joss Whedon tried to kill their classmate.

25 years in jail.

Whole lot 'o shit, and stuff that's there already.

Who the fuck would ever do that, or even think to do that even?!

Yes. They did that frequently, and best of all, I was able to immediately and directly respond to them when they did.

But that's only because Joey Lawrence is part of the Hindu pantheon.

I think when Kinja comes in I'll try to spend more time with my friends from college, rather than giving this website page views.

Woah! Back the fuck up!