Wouldn't be able to eat that hamburger if it had cheese on it.

That's where I acquired my great respect for fig leaves.

My parents are teachers! Maybe I can still cash in! That's how I'm currently using a $3k architecture design program for free.

Any leads? I could go for a marked-down burrito right about now…

Squiggy Fumblebutts III is using his real name.

The people writing laws are too old to really understand what hacking entails/the potential social damage that it can do?

To be fair, some of us didn't want to leave Europe in the first place.

Especially strange given that Poland's national borders have been all over the place in the last hundred years.

Fine! I'll start my own AV Club! With Blackjack and a commenting system with nested comments!

The remaining 14% is pure whimsy.

Really? Do you mind if I do an experiment?

I'm going for broke and pretending that Fraggles are a thing.

Being proud of your race is easier than actually achieving something yourself? That's all I got. Doesn't explain hard-working racists though.

I too have a confession to make: I'm only 86% sarcastic.

I see why they hired you for that new job.

FRANK STALLONE?!?!?!?!

Granted, why God chose to disproportionately afflict his chosen people with a genetic propensity for asthma and red/green color-blindness is another question entirely.

Of course they're not God's chosen people. They are in favor of exterminating God's chosen people.

She was on in the Simon Amstell era when Bill Bailey was still around.

Who knew that the guy who invented the electric can-opener was a racist shit-bag?