Yes, but that was six years ago. All you had then was okcupid and match. And we had to walk uphill both ways to get there.

Have you dated online, Mark? It's amazing anyone does it with less than three assistants.

"...her new web series"

I was watching a cosmetic surgery show once , the woman was getting liposuction, skin removal and breast implants all at the same time and they had her whole torso cut open. Nipple sliced half off for implantation. And they blurred the half sliced off nipple. mutilated body ok, but don't show that nipple

Will they also be rehabbing New York's wig?

It took me a couple seconds to figure out what was going on in the second photo, till I realized they blurred the woman's nipples. Which, on a show like this, is really the most hilarious thing of all. #irony.

Its kind of a love of routine (while I'm sure you're perfectly lovely) - Once I have a good experience with someone, and sort of bond with them a little, I always want to use them. I have a great limo company I use in NY. The drivers I request are Carmen and Ever, a married couple who are working their asses off to…

My favorite table was a surprise...6 top of parents with 4 kids on a busy Saturday night. They were fantastic. The kids were so polite, even the 2 year old said please and thank you, the older kids asked their parents if it was okay to have refill of soda or if they should get water (it was a special occasion so they…

At my job, I keep an entire rainbow of sharpie pens with me (downtime = coloring! woo!) and I arrange them with the caps stuck across my apron in a gradient. Whenever the kitchen is crashing and burning and all there is to do is high-anxiety waiting, it's good to put them back in order. This has the added bonus of…

I waited tables at a cafe in PA during college, and one day I heard the two other lunch shift waitresses (who were white like me) bitching about a table, and it soon became clear why: they had a problem waiting on the four black women who were seated there. I immediately said that I would wait on them (because fuck…

I worked in a very large Mexican restaurant after college. It was 2 stories with a bar and lunch shift closer had the whole restaurant to themselves after about 2:00 until dinner came on at 5:00. Most days of the week it wasn't a huge deal, but I often closed on Fridays. You would get people who skipped out of work…

There's no way I can list the many, many amazing, awesome customers that I've waited on over the years! Seriously, people can be the fucking BEST.

Worked in a restaurant, worked in a bar, dated my share of service folks - I do try to be a good customer.

One evening, my girlfriend and I went to a chain restaurant before heading to the movies.

My favorite "good customer" story is the lady who came into Friendly's (ugh) and ordered something small, I can't recall what at this point. She was easy to wait on and I don't remember doing anything special, but I guess I did a good job because she wrote on the ticket that she wished she had a bit more money to…